1 00:00:03,962 --> 00:00:04,963 [cat meows] 2 00:00:08,466 --> 00:00:09,384 [cat meows] 3 00:00:29,070 --> 00:00:31,406 - [speaking indistinctly] 4 00:00:35,368 --> 00:00:36,411 - Who is this? 5 00:00:45,253 --> 00:00:46,671 [sighs] 6 00:00:46,838 --> 00:00:48,340 - In the original "Matrix" movie, 7 00:00:48,423 --> 00:00:50,800 seeing the same cat twice was a "glitch" in the system. 8 00:00:50,925 --> 00:00:52,969 It was proof that the matrix was real. 9 00:00:53,053 --> 00:00:54,679 - Training the cat was both easier 10 00:00:54,763 --> 00:00:56,723 and more boring than I thought it would be. 11 00:00:56,806 --> 00:00:59,893 It basically involved putting down little piles of treats. 12 00:01:01,311 --> 00:01:02,395 The cat barely cared that 13 00:01:02,479 --> 00:01:04,522 it had to run through the ceiling. 14 00:01:04,647 --> 00:01:06,441 - Why didn't we just get two black cats? 15 00:01:08,568 --> 00:01:10,195 Okay. 16 00:01:10,320 --> 00:01:12,322 - Turns out, Glen in the warehouse 17 00:01:12,364 --> 00:01:14,574 has a twin brother that Dwight doesn't know about. 18 00:01:14,741 --> 00:01:15,784 Ben. 19 00:01:17,911 --> 00:01:20,538 - So we threw them in too. 20 00:01:20,622 --> 00:01:22,040 - This just came for you. 21 00:01:23,958 --> 00:01:26,920 [phone ringing] 22 00:01:36,930 --> 00:01:38,014 - Hello? 23 00:01:38,098 --> 00:01:39,391 - Meet me in the warehouse. 24 00:01:39,474 --> 00:01:41,851 And watch out for the men in reception. 25 00:01:41,976 --> 00:01:43,186 - There's no men at rec-- 26 00:01:43,269 --> 00:01:44,312 [gasps] 27 00:01:48,441 --> 00:01:49,943 - Meet me in the warehouse. 28 00:01:59,119 --> 00:02:00,078 - Hank? 29 00:02:04,874 --> 00:02:07,210 - That is the name I allowed you to know me by 30 00:02:07,335 --> 00:02:08,420 while I watched over you, 31 00:02:08,586 --> 00:02:11,006 waiting for the time to approach. 32 00:02:11,089 --> 00:02:12,549 That time has come. 33 00:02:13,466 --> 00:02:16,386 And now you may know my real name, 34 00:02:16,511 --> 00:02:17,637 Dorpheus. 35 00:02:17,762 --> 00:02:18,680 - Dorpheus? 36 00:02:18,805 --> 00:02:20,515 - I'm Morpheus's brother. 37 00:02:27,647 --> 00:02:29,899 - But "The Matrix" isn't real. 38 00:02:29,941 --> 00:02:33,737 It's a trilogy of flawless, life-changing films 39 00:02:33,778 --> 00:02:35,196 and an online game. 40 00:02:35,280 --> 00:02:37,949 - The first "Matrix" movie was a program 41 00:02:38,033 --> 00:02:41,286 written by my team to prepare people for the truth. 42 00:02:41,369 --> 00:02:44,122 But then the machines countered with their own program 43 00:02:44,205 --> 00:02:46,541 to make it seem as if a peace was achieved. 44 00:02:46,666 --> 00:02:49,919 - So... there is no peace? 45 00:02:49,961 --> 00:02:51,212 - There is not. 46 00:02:51,296 --> 00:02:52,881 - Oh, that is terrible news. 47 00:02:52,964 --> 00:02:54,424 - Dwight, we need your help. 48 00:02:54,507 --> 00:02:56,926 I would like you to join my underground army 49 00:02:56,968 --> 00:02:58,678 and help us wage war 50 00:02:58,720 --> 00:03:02,682 for the freedom of all humankind. 51 00:03:02,766 --> 00:03:04,142 - Hank is good on his feet. 52 00:03:04,225 --> 00:03:06,644 - Right? I told you he'd nail it. 53 00:03:09,272 --> 00:03:10,899 - If you take the blue pill, 54 00:03:10,982 --> 00:03:13,109 you will stay in the matrix. 55 00:03:13,193 --> 00:03:15,695 You will remember none of this. 56 00:03:15,737 --> 00:03:18,406 Life will go on as it is for you. 57 00:03:18,531 --> 00:03:20,950 If you take the red pill, 58 00:03:21,034 --> 00:03:23,370 I will open your eyes, 59 00:03:23,411 --> 00:03:26,039 and you will see just how deep... 60 00:03:26,122 --> 00:03:27,749 both: The rabbit hole goes. 61 00:03:31,044 --> 00:03:33,088 - I'll take the blue pill. 62 00:03:33,171 --> 00:03:35,965 - Wait, now, the blue will keep you 63 00:03:36,007 --> 00:03:37,425 in the program. 64 00:03:37,550 --> 00:03:38,885 The red's the cool one. 65 00:03:39,010 --> 00:03:41,137 - I understand. I'd like the blue pill, please. 66 00:03:41,262 --> 00:03:42,639 - Well, maybe I didn't explain myself clearly-- 67 00:03:42,764 --> 00:03:44,349 - No, Dorpheus, you-- no, you were very clear. 68 00:03:44,432 --> 00:03:46,685 It's just... ah, 69 00:03:46,726 --> 00:03:48,645 you know, I really appreciate 70 00:03:48,728 --> 00:03:50,480 the work that you and your brother are doing. 71 00:03:50,563 --> 00:03:52,232 Appreciate's too small a word. 72 00:03:52,273 --> 00:03:54,943 But the timing is terrible right now. 73 00:03:55,026 --> 00:03:56,486 They just promoted me to manager. 74 00:03:56,653 --> 00:03:57,946 Plus, I own this building, 75 00:03:58,071 --> 00:03:59,698 I run a very substantial farm, 76 00:03:59,823 --> 00:04:03,535 and I'm getting married soon to a woman I love. 77 00:04:03,618 --> 00:04:06,454 And okay, yeah, maybe that love is just zeroes and ones, 78 00:04:06,538 --> 00:04:10,083 but I don't want to lose it. 79 00:04:10,125 --> 00:04:13,086 No one hates machines more than me, 80 00:04:13,211 --> 00:04:16,840 but I'm happy. 81 00:04:16,923 --> 00:04:18,967 I'm truly happy. 82 00:04:19,009 --> 00:04:20,343 - Aw! 83 00:04:20,427 --> 00:04:21,594 - Are you kidding me? 84 00:04:21,678 --> 00:04:23,138 I hired 30 people! 85 00:04:24,764 --> 00:04:26,433 - If the blue pill's not safe to swallow, 86 00:04:26,516 --> 00:04:27,892 someone should tell us now! 87 00:04:33,398 --> 00:04:36,234 [cheerful music] 88 00:04:36,317 --> 00:04:43,324 {\an8}? ? 89 00:05:08,058 --> 00:05:10,268 {\an8}- The documentary series finished airing ages ago. 90 00:05:10,435 --> 00:05:12,395 {\an8}Why is PBS sending another crew? 91 00:05:12,479 --> 00:05:14,481 {\an8}- We're getting bonus footage for the DVD. 92 00:05:14,522 --> 00:05:17,108 {\an8}- Pfft. Nobody buys DVDs anymore. 93 00:05:17,192 --> 00:05:18,526 {\an8}- It'll be a pledge gift. 94 00:05:18,568 --> 00:05:20,612 {\an8}- PBS. 95 00:05:20,695 --> 00:05:22,697 {\an8}The propaganda wing of Bill and Melinda Gates 96 00:05:22,781 --> 00:05:24,991 {\an8}and viewers like you. 97 00:05:25,116 --> 00:05:26,743 {\an8}In the past year, 98 00:05:26,785 --> 00:05:28,787 {\an8}I have consolidated the entire Scranton paper market. 99 00:05:28,828 --> 00:05:30,663 {\an8}We regained the White Pages, 100 00:05:30,830 --> 00:05:32,207 {\an8}the school district, Lackawanna County. 101 00:05:32,332 --> 00:05:33,541 {\an8}We supply them all. 102 00:05:33,625 --> 00:05:35,877 {\an8}I'm getting married tomorrow afternoon, 103 00:05:35,919 --> 00:05:37,587 {\an8}and in the morning, there's a mini reunion-- 104 00:05:37,671 --> 00:05:39,589 {\an8}a kind of "where are they now" panel 105 00:05:39,631 --> 00:05:41,257 {\an8}at a local theater. 106 00:05:41,383 --> 00:05:42,550 {\an8}It'll be nice to see everyone again. 107 00:05:42,592 --> 00:05:43,927 {\an8}[laughs] 108 00:05:44,052 --> 00:05:46,596 {\an8}I haven't seen Kevin since we let him go. 109 00:05:46,638 --> 00:05:50,183 {\an8}[mimicking trumpet] 110 00:05:50,350 --> 00:05:53,895 {\an8}Today marks several important milestones. 111 00:05:53,978 --> 00:05:57,691 {\an8}Stanley, as you know, is retiring. 112 00:05:57,774 --> 00:05:58,942 {\an8}[applause] - [laughing] 113 00:05:59,025 --> 00:06:01,152 {\an8}- Yes. Whoo, whoo, whoo. 114 00:06:01,236 --> 00:06:02,987 {\an8}- Ah, I've been looking forward to this day 115 00:06:03,029 --> 00:06:04,531 {\an8}since I was 18 years old. 116 00:06:04,614 --> 00:06:06,074 {\an8}- Speech! - No! 117 00:06:06,116 --> 00:06:09,869 {\an8}And our next and most thickly frosted cake 118 00:06:09,994 --> 00:06:12,414 {\an8}is for Kevin. 119 00:06:12,539 --> 00:06:14,541 {\an8}- Yes! - [laughing] 120 00:06:14,624 --> 00:06:15,959 {\an8}- Wait, why? 121 00:06:16,084 --> 00:06:17,919 {\an8}- Go ahead and just read the frosting. 122 00:06:19,337 --> 00:06:20,547 {\an8}- "Get out"? 123 00:06:20,588 --> 00:06:22,048 {\an8}- Mm-hmm. - What does that mean? 124 00:06:22,173 --> 00:06:24,217 {\an8}- It's a colloquial way of saying "you're fired," Kevin, 125 00:06:24,300 --> 00:06:26,261 {\an8}which you are. - What? 126 00:06:26,344 --> 00:06:28,054 {\an8}- Dwight, you can't do that. 127 00:06:28,138 --> 00:06:29,180 {\an8}- The cake has spoken, Pam. 128 00:06:29,264 --> 00:06:30,849 {\an8}Sorry! Heh. - What? 129 00:06:30,932 --> 00:06:34,060 {\an8}- Well, if anyone here can make a case for Kevin staying... 130 00:06:34,185 --> 00:06:35,145 {\an8}- Dwight... 131 00:06:35,228 --> 00:06:36,604 {\an8}[overlapping objections] 132 00:06:36,730 --> 00:06:38,898 {\an8}- Based... on his merit. 133 00:06:39,065 --> 00:06:40,608 {\an8}- Ooh. 134 00:06:42,068 --> 00:06:43,403 {\an8}- Um... 135 00:06:43,528 --> 00:06:46,322 {\an8}- I'm... good. 136 00:06:46,406 --> 00:06:47,866 {\an8}- Well, Toby'll stop it. 137 00:06:47,949 --> 00:06:49,701 {\an8}Anytime anyone's ever been fired, 138 00:06:49,826 --> 00:06:51,995 {\an8}Toby's blocked it, so-- - Yeah, yeah. 139 00:06:52,120 --> 00:06:53,371 {\an8}I don't think-- - Toby, wait, wait. 140 00:06:53,455 --> 00:06:55,498 {\an8}Hold that thought. 141 00:06:55,540 --> 00:06:56,875 {\an8}Here's your cake. 142 00:06:59,544 --> 00:07:02,005 {\an8}Bye-bye, Toby. 143 00:07:02,088 --> 00:07:04,257 {\an8}- [sniffling] 144 00:07:04,299 --> 00:07:06,551 {\an8}[crying] At least I got chocolate. 145 00:07:16,603 --> 00:07:17,979 {\an8}- I bike to work now. 146 00:07:18,146 --> 00:07:19,981 {\an8}Saves on gas, cheaper than a vasectomy, 147 00:07:20,106 --> 00:07:22,150 {\an8}and, uh, oh, yeah, it's good for the environment too. 148 00:07:24,778 --> 00:07:26,112 {\an8}Pam and I are great. 149 00:07:26,237 --> 00:07:27,614 {\an8}She just recently finished her mural 150 00:07:27,655 --> 00:07:29,199 {\an8}for the Irish Cultural Center. 151 00:07:29,282 --> 00:07:30,158 {\an8}[cheers and applause] 152 00:07:30,241 --> 00:07:32,118 {\an8}- Whoo! - Can you clap? 153 00:07:32,202 --> 00:07:34,037 {\an8}Can you clap for Mom? [mouthing word] 154 00:07:34,079 --> 00:07:37,290 {\an8}And Dwight is imitating Japanese business practices 155 00:07:37,374 --> 00:07:40,627 for reasons he explained to us in Japanese. 156 00:07:42,379 --> 00:07:45,382 - Jim's been great the past few months. 157 00:07:45,423 --> 00:07:48,385 He, uh, watched the kids while I finished my paintings, 158 00:07:48,468 --> 00:07:51,429 and he made that amazing DVD for me. 159 00:07:51,596 --> 00:07:53,973 So I've been looking for 160 00:07:54,099 --> 00:07:56,559 a Jim-sized way to say thank you. 161 00:07:56,643 --> 00:07:58,478 You know, a big surprise. 162 00:07:58,520 --> 00:08:01,314 So tomorrow night, the PBS folks 163 00:08:01,398 --> 00:08:03,316 are throwing us a party in the warehouse, 164 00:08:03,358 --> 00:08:05,318 a kind of "project's over" party, 165 00:08:05,402 --> 00:08:07,696 and I finished my mural just in time, 166 00:08:07,779 --> 00:08:12,867 so I'm gonna dedicate it to Jim. 167 00:08:12,951 --> 00:08:15,704 [whispering] Angela, are you ready for the wedding? 168 00:08:15,829 --> 00:08:17,080 - Yes. 169 00:08:17,122 --> 00:08:19,249 My heart is so open. 170 00:08:19,374 --> 00:08:22,127 I am so at peace. 171 00:08:22,252 --> 00:08:24,629 [scoffs] Look at Meredith. 172 00:08:24,713 --> 00:08:25,755 She's disgusting. 173 00:08:25,922 --> 00:08:27,549 Those feet-- 174 00:08:27,716 --> 00:08:29,467 they're like the paws of an orangutan. 175 00:08:29,551 --> 00:08:30,927 - I think she looks good. 176 00:08:31,011 --> 00:08:32,345 Now that she's wearing sports bras, 177 00:08:32,512 --> 00:08:34,097 we don't see her boobs as much. 178 00:08:34,180 --> 00:08:35,515 - I was at a dog fight this summer, 179 00:08:35,557 --> 00:08:37,017 and I thought...[clicks tongue] 180 00:08:37,100 --> 00:08:39,227 We should not be eating these things. 181 00:08:39,352 --> 00:08:40,603 Animals. 182 00:08:40,687 --> 00:08:42,105 So I went vegan. 183 00:08:42,230 --> 00:08:43,898 One thing led to another. 184 00:08:43,982 --> 00:08:46,067 Now I'm in these yoga pants. 185 00:08:48,528 --> 00:08:49,863 - That is all. Have a good morning. 186 00:08:49,904 --> 00:08:51,072 - Thank you. - Thank you, Dwight. 187 00:08:53,575 --> 00:08:55,618 - [laughing] - What was that for? 188 00:08:55,660 --> 00:08:58,079 - To remind you that our wedding's gonna be wonderful. 189 00:08:58,246 --> 00:09:00,957 - Ah, I know. It just feels so empty with... 190 00:09:01,041 --> 00:09:02,751 so many of the old gang gone. 191 00:09:02,876 --> 00:09:04,753 Plus, my brother and sister can't make it. 192 00:09:04,836 --> 00:09:07,297 - D, it's gonna be perfect. 193 00:09:07,339 --> 00:09:09,841 The only people that need to be there are you and me. 194 00:09:09,924 --> 00:09:11,634 - Oh, and the old man to feed us the cheese 195 00:09:11,676 --> 00:09:13,136 that he's been fermenting since the day of my birth. 196 00:09:13,219 --> 00:09:14,429 You keep forgetting about him. 197 00:09:14,512 --> 00:09:16,639 - I don't--I don't know why. 198 00:09:16,723 --> 00:09:18,350 [elevator bell dings] 199 00:09:18,475 --> 00:09:20,268 - Move in. - Let's go. 200 00:09:20,435 --> 00:09:21,311 - All right, all right. - All right. 201 00:09:21,394 --> 00:09:22,729 - Whoa. - Move in, please. 202 00:09:22,771 --> 00:09:24,064 - Easy, Nate. - Just wait for the next one. 203 00:09:24,230 --> 00:09:25,190 - Move in, please. - Okay. 204 00:09:25,273 --> 00:09:26,775 - All right. - Move in, please. 205 00:09:26,816 --> 00:09:29,194 - I'm gonna wait. - One ride'll save us energy. 206 00:09:29,277 --> 00:09:30,278 Move in, please. - I'm gonna wait. 207 00:09:30,445 --> 00:09:31,571 I'm gonna wait. Nate, I'm gonna wait! 208 00:09:31,613 --> 00:09:32,906 - There's no room. - Nate. Nate! 209 00:09:32,947 --> 00:09:35,158 Nate, I'm g-- - Move in, please. 210 00:09:35,241 --> 00:09:37,577 - It's not Japan. - Move in. 211 00:09:37,660 --> 00:09:38,912 - Watch-- - Ah! 212 00:09:40,705 --> 00:09:42,624 - I brought in some new faces, 213 00:09:42,707 --> 00:09:44,000 and one old. 214 00:09:44,084 --> 00:09:45,669 I always liked Devon. 215 00:09:45,794 --> 00:09:48,129 I hired him back after Creed faked his own death 216 00:09:48,296 --> 00:09:50,131 in the baler the day after the doc aired. 217 00:09:50,256 --> 00:09:52,217 The only person he fooled was Kevin. 218 00:09:52,258 --> 00:09:53,426 Then the police showed up. 219 00:09:53,468 --> 00:09:55,261 Turns out, Creed was in the band 220 00:09:55,303 --> 00:09:57,555 The Grass Roots in the 1960s. 221 00:09:57,639 --> 00:09:59,516 During that time, the police say, 222 00:09:59,683 --> 00:10:04,020 he sold drugs and trafficked in endangered species meat 223 00:10:04,187 --> 00:10:07,774 and stole weapons-grade LSD from the military. 224 00:10:10,318 --> 00:10:12,445 - Oh, some fudge? - Oh, thanks. 225 00:10:12,529 --> 00:10:13,988 I love your fudge. 226 00:10:14,030 --> 00:10:15,865 - Thanks. - Mm. 227 00:10:15,990 --> 00:10:17,909 I think I gained a couple pounds since I got here. 228 00:10:17,951 --> 00:10:20,328 - [laughing] Oh, you can afford it. 229 00:10:20,412 --> 00:10:23,623 After 16 years, it's strange sitting across from somebody 230 00:10:23,707 --> 00:10:26,251 who isn't Stanley. 231 00:10:26,376 --> 00:10:30,005 But he'll get there. 232 00:10:30,046 --> 00:10:31,756 - Okay, the limo's gonna be here at 5:00. 233 00:10:31,840 --> 00:10:33,758 I need everybody to be ready 'cause I want to pack in a lot. 234 00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:35,427 - Party time whorehouse. 235 00:10:35,510 --> 00:10:37,512 - Uh, no. No whorehouse. This is Dwight's night, okay? 236 00:10:37,637 --> 00:10:39,347 - Well, you're the bestisch mensch. 237 00:10:39,389 --> 00:10:42,642 - Dwight has made me his bestisch mensch, 238 00:10:42,767 --> 00:10:45,395 which is Schrute for best man. 239 00:10:45,437 --> 00:10:47,605 He's putting himself entirely in my hands tonight. 240 00:10:47,647 --> 00:10:49,024 And I know, for over 12 years, 241 00:10:49,149 --> 00:10:51,026 I've done nothing but trick and prank him. 242 00:10:51,109 --> 00:10:53,236 But tonight... 243 00:10:53,278 --> 00:10:55,405 only good surprises. 244 00:10:55,488 --> 00:10:56,865 "Guten pranken." 245 00:10:56,906 --> 00:10:57,991 [chuckles] 246 00:10:58,116 --> 00:10:59,117 - I just want everyone to know 247 00:10:59,284 --> 00:11:01,036 that I'm really horny. 248 00:11:01,077 --> 00:11:02,704 - Noted. 249 00:11:02,746 --> 00:11:05,248 - I hope something happens to me tonight 250 00:11:05,415 --> 00:11:07,667 such as what happens to the fellows in the porns. 251 00:11:07,834 --> 00:11:09,627 - Okay, no women will be degraded 252 00:11:09,669 --> 00:11:11,338 at this bachelor party. 253 00:11:11,421 --> 00:11:14,382 And if we have steak, guys, grass-fed. 254 00:11:14,549 --> 00:11:16,843 Also, no Cuban cigars. We don't support that. 255 00:11:16,885 --> 00:11:18,303 - Oh, hey, Jim, I forgot mention. 256 00:11:18,428 --> 00:11:20,347 Oftentimes, in Hollywood portrayals of bachelor parties, 257 00:11:20,513 --> 00:11:21,973 there are accidental murders. 258 00:11:22,057 --> 00:11:23,683 That won't be necessary tonight. 259 00:11:23,808 --> 00:11:25,060 - Great, now we got three hours to fill. 260 00:11:25,143 --> 00:11:26,394 - Okay, hold on. 261 00:11:26,436 --> 00:11:28,021 Are you sure Mose isn't going to show up? 262 00:11:28,146 --> 00:11:29,606 - Ever since Angela moved in 263 00:11:29,647 --> 00:11:31,483 and Mose had stopped sleeping at the foot of my bed, 264 00:11:31,524 --> 00:11:33,443 he's been acting pretty weird about this whole wedding thing. 265 00:11:33,526 --> 00:11:35,320 - Mose has been weird? 266 00:11:35,487 --> 00:11:37,489 That's so unlike him. 267 00:11:37,614 --> 00:11:40,492 [indistinct chatter] 268 00:11:48,875 --> 00:11:50,210 [horn honking] 269 00:11:59,052 --> 00:12:00,261 - My heart goes out to him, 270 00:12:00,303 --> 00:12:02,847 but you think Andy wants some guy in a Rolex 271 00:12:02,889 --> 00:12:06,101 and a town car telling him he's sorry about what happened? 272 00:12:06,226 --> 00:12:07,852 I actually bought it for this weekend. 273 00:12:07,936 --> 00:12:10,105 Ain't no clocks on the farm, y'all. 274 00:12:10,230 --> 00:12:12,440 I wonder if anyone else made one of these. 275 00:12:12,524 --> 00:12:14,943 Maybe Toby? 276 00:12:15,068 --> 00:12:16,319 - Yeah, sure, I'll talk about it. 277 00:12:16,403 --> 00:12:18,279 Why not? 278 00:12:18,321 --> 00:12:19,739 "America's Next A Cappella Sensation" 279 00:12:19,823 --> 00:12:21,282 aired my audition. 280 00:12:21,408 --> 00:12:23,702 And when I started sobbing uncontrollably, 281 00:12:23,743 --> 00:12:28,081 apparently that struck a chord with quite a lot of people. 282 00:12:28,248 --> 00:12:30,917 Not a very compassionate chord. 283 00:12:31,042 --> 00:12:34,212 The clip went viral, as they say. 284 00:12:34,295 --> 00:12:35,797 - You can't just sit here and cry. 285 00:12:35,880 --> 00:12:38,466 - Oh, I can so just sit here and cry! 286 00:12:38,550 --> 00:12:40,593 Two million hits in the first week, 287 00:12:40,719 --> 00:12:42,679 and then the parodies started. 288 00:12:42,762 --> 00:12:45,223 One from the Philippines got 12 million hits. 289 00:12:45,265 --> 00:12:48,143 - [speaking native language] 290 00:12:51,604 --> 00:12:54,357 - And the late night comedy guys had a field day with it. 291 00:12:54,399 --> 00:12:57,861 - [fake crying] - Oh. 292 00:12:57,902 --> 00:13:02,407 Aw, come on, Baby Wawa. Don't be such a baby. 293 00:13:02,490 --> 00:13:04,159 Oh, no. 294 00:13:06,327 --> 00:13:08,371 It's gonna be all right. 295 00:13:08,455 --> 00:13:11,332 It's gonna be all right. 296 00:13:11,374 --> 00:13:13,168 For Weekend Update, I'm Seth Meyers. 297 00:13:13,251 --> 00:13:14,252 That's Baby Wawa. 298 00:13:14,377 --> 00:13:16,296 Good night. - Bye. 299 00:13:16,338 --> 00:13:18,256 - After my clip blew up, I actually got a call 300 00:13:18,423 --> 00:13:21,259 from the double rainbow guy and the fat "Star Wars" kid. 301 00:13:21,301 --> 00:13:23,178 Turns out they have a support group. 302 00:13:25,263 --> 00:13:26,681 Not really my scene. 303 00:13:38,234 --> 00:13:41,529 - Years ago, the senator promised a left turn lane 304 00:13:41,613 --> 00:13:43,156 by the Arby's. 305 00:13:43,239 --> 00:13:46,076 So I wanna know where in the name of horsey sauce is it? 306 00:13:46,159 --> 00:13:47,410 Well, yeah, you--hold on. 307 00:13:47,494 --> 00:13:49,120 - Hi. 308 00:13:49,245 --> 00:13:51,289 I keep seeing this symbol in the accounts from last year. 309 00:13:51,331 --> 00:13:52,999 It's all over the place. 310 00:13:53,124 --> 00:13:54,209 I don't know what it means. 311 00:13:54,334 --> 00:13:55,627 - That's the reason Kevin got fired. 312 00:13:55,669 --> 00:13:57,170 It's his magic number. 313 00:13:57,253 --> 00:13:58,922 He used to use it to balance his accounts. 314 00:13:59,005 --> 00:14:00,674 He used to call it a keleven. 315 00:14:00,757 --> 00:14:02,759 He told Dwight, "A mistake plus keleven 316 00:14:02,842 --> 00:14:04,511 gets you home by seven." 317 00:14:04,678 --> 00:14:06,638 He was home by 4:45 that day. 318 00:14:10,850 --> 00:14:12,435 - Oh, I live in Poland now... 319 00:14:12,560 --> 00:14:15,438 the Scranton of the EU. 320 00:14:15,605 --> 00:14:18,274 Thank you for flying me out here for the weekend. 321 00:14:18,358 --> 00:14:20,610 I'm looking forward to the reunion panel tomorrow. 322 00:14:20,694 --> 00:14:22,779 Can't wait to see everyone. 323 00:14:22,862 --> 00:14:24,781 Well, almost everyone. 324 00:14:24,864 --> 00:14:25,990 - Hello! 325 00:14:26,074 --> 00:14:27,826 [laughing] Hello! 326 00:14:27,909 --> 00:14:29,828 - Oh. - Hi! 327 00:14:29,869 --> 00:14:32,872 - No. - Oh. [laughs] 328 00:14:32,956 --> 00:14:34,416 - How did you know my plane had arrived? 329 00:14:34,541 --> 00:14:35,917 How long have you been stalking me? 330 00:14:36,084 --> 00:14:37,961 - Oh, no, no, no. My plane just got in. 331 00:14:38,003 --> 00:14:39,504 From New York. 332 00:14:39,587 --> 00:14:41,214 Are you still with Piotr? - No. 333 00:14:41,381 --> 00:14:42,924 And I thought I unfriended you. 334 00:14:43,091 --> 00:14:46,553 - Anyone can follow a Twitter feed. 335 00:14:46,636 --> 00:14:49,264 Wanna share a cab? 336 00:14:49,431 --> 00:14:52,183 After Dwight fired me, I moved to New York... 337 00:14:52,308 --> 00:14:54,894 to write the great American novel. 338 00:14:54,978 --> 00:14:57,605 I have six roommates. Heh. 339 00:14:57,647 --> 00:14:59,315 Which are better than friends, you know, 340 00:14:59,482 --> 00:15:01,234 'cause they have to give you one month's notice 341 00:15:01,317 --> 00:15:04,029 before they leave. 342 00:15:05,530 --> 00:15:07,490 - Hey. [laughs] 343 00:15:07,532 --> 00:15:09,367 - [laughs] Hey. 344 00:15:09,451 --> 00:15:11,119 - Look, I forgot my copier code. 345 00:15:11,161 --> 00:15:13,955 You think I could mooch just this once? 346 00:15:13,997 --> 00:15:15,498 - You know, Dwight doesn't really like us 347 00:15:15,540 --> 00:15:17,417 to mingle our codes. 348 00:15:17,500 --> 00:15:19,586 I mean, if I told you that it was 11-79, 349 00:15:19,627 --> 00:15:22,339 I could get in a lot of trouble. 350 00:15:22,380 --> 00:15:23,840 - [quietly] Oh. 351 00:15:23,882 --> 00:15:25,300 [loudly] Fine. 352 00:15:25,383 --> 00:15:27,302 Don't help me then! [laughs] 353 00:15:33,350 --> 00:15:35,727 - Hey-oh! - Andy? 354 00:15:35,769 --> 00:15:37,437 - You're back? - Yeah. 355 00:15:37,520 --> 00:15:40,357 - That's Baby Wawa, right? Oh, my God! 356 00:15:40,440 --> 00:15:42,192 - Hey, man, good to see you. 357 00:15:42,275 --> 00:15:44,027 - Thank you. Yeah. - Andy. 358 00:15:44,152 --> 00:15:46,154 - Hey! Aw! 359 00:15:46,196 --> 00:15:48,239 A bear hug from my favorite Mama Grizzly. 360 00:15:48,281 --> 00:15:49,866 - Andy, I've been worried about you. 361 00:15:50,033 --> 00:15:51,451 How are you? 362 00:15:51,493 --> 00:15:53,745 - A little warm. - Poor, poor Andy. 363 00:15:53,870 --> 00:15:55,663 - Okay. [struggling] 364 00:15:55,705 --> 00:15:56,915 Aw. 365 00:15:56,998 --> 00:15:58,166 Thank you, Phyllis. - Hello, hello. 366 00:15:58,249 --> 00:15:59,751 - Hey! - Dar-ryl! 367 00:15:59,876 --> 00:16:01,086 - Darryl! - Hey! 368 00:16:01,169 --> 00:16:02,629 - Hey, what's up? 369 00:16:02,712 --> 00:16:03,713 - Didn't I just see you at the airport 370 00:16:03,797 --> 00:16:05,507 jumping in a limo? - What? 371 00:16:05,548 --> 00:16:07,300 Must've been another devilishly handsome, 372 00:16:07,467 --> 00:16:08,968 debonair individual. - Hmm. 373 00:16:09,052 --> 00:16:10,178 - Hey, man, how you doing? 374 00:16:10,261 --> 00:16:11,846 I, um--I didn't call 375 00:16:12,013 --> 00:16:13,223 'cause I figured you changed the number. 376 00:16:13,306 --> 00:16:15,058 - No, I didn't change the number. 377 00:16:15,100 --> 00:16:16,309 All good, though. 378 00:16:16,393 --> 00:16:17,519 Phone never rings. 379 00:16:18,937 --> 00:16:20,522 - What? Ohh! 380 00:16:20,605 --> 00:16:21,648 - Surprise! 381 00:16:21,773 --> 00:16:23,191 I thought you guys couldn't come. 382 00:16:23,316 --> 00:16:24,109 - Yeah, but then they moved the panel 383 00:16:24,275 --> 00:16:25,276 to the same weekend, 384 00:16:25,360 --> 00:16:27,028 and the doc crew paid to fly us in. 385 00:16:27,112 --> 00:16:28,780 It was kismet. 386 00:16:28,822 --> 00:16:31,408 - Kismet? Yeah, right. 387 00:16:31,449 --> 00:16:34,911 Pam and I came up with excuses for every other weekend. 388 00:16:35,078 --> 00:16:36,871 You remember my two lap band surgeries, right? 389 00:16:36,996 --> 00:16:38,456 Neither do I. 390 00:16:38,540 --> 00:16:41,167 "Guten prank" number one. 391 00:16:41,292 --> 00:16:42,961 - Whoa, back together again! 392 00:16:43,086 --> 00:16:44,587 - Yeah! - Yes. 393 00:16:44,713 --> 00:16:46,464 The--the-- 394 00:16:46,548 --> 00:16:47,716 we never really came up with a name 395 00:16:47,799 --> 00:16:48,758 for the three of us, did we? 396 00:16:48,800 --> 00:16:50,010 - No, we did not. - Yeah. 397 00:16:50,051 --> 00:16:51,511 - Well, I pitched the three amigos. 398 00:16:51,553 --> 00:16:52,637 - Amigos isn't-- that's not right. 399 00:16:52,721 --> 00:16:54,764 - Yeah, it's not good. It's not good. 400 00:16:54,931 --> 00:16:56,307 - You ready for tonight? We gonna tear up the town? 401 00:16:56,474 --> 00:16:58,685 - Uh, better ask Jim. 402 00:16:58,810 --> 00:17:00,270 - And Jim will say nothing. 403 00:17:00,395 --> 00:17:01,938 - [gasps] Darryl! 404 00:17:02,022 --> 00:17:03,773 Andy! - Hey, Pam! 405 00:17:03,857 --> 00:17:05,775 - Hey, Pam! How are you? 406 00:17:05,817 --> 00:17:08,695 - We're fine. Yeah. 407 00:17:08,778 --> 00:17:11,364 And I'm sure that you guys are fine too. 408 00:17:11,406 --> 00:17:14,242 Because why wouldn't you be? - Mm-hmm. 409 00:17:14,409 --> 00:17:16,870 - Darryl, oh, my gosh. How is Austin? 410 00:17:16,911 --> 00:17:18,496 Tell me everything. How's the merger? 411 00:17:18,580 --> 00:17:20,081 I feel like I read about Athlead all the time. 412 00:17:20,206 --> 00:17:22,667 - I love it. And it's Athleap now. 413 00:17:22,709 --> 00:17:25,503 And the city is amazing. 414 00:17:25,670 --> 00:17:26,921 - Yeah? - Yeah. 415 00:17:26,963 --> 00:17:29,257 Yeah, it's hot, the music is awesome, 416 00:17:29,341 --> 00:17:30,633 and the tacos are... [cell phone chimes] 417 00:17:30,800 --> 00:17:32,010 For real. - Wow! 418 00:17:32,052 --> 00:17:33,845 That sounds incredible. 419 00:17:34,012 --> 00:17:35,847 - Oh, guys. Limo's here. 420 00:17:35,930 --> 00:17:37,932 Let's do this. Change if you need to. 421 00:17:38,016 --> 00:17:40,435 - Whoo, whoo, whoo! - Okay, you guys, have fun. 422 00:17:40,560 --> 00:17:42,520 You too, Andy. 423 00:17:46,483 --> 00:17:47,942 - Yeah. - Ohh! 424 00:17:48,026 --> 00:17:49,736 - Aw! - Whoa-ho! 425 00:17:49,861 --> 00:17:52,822 Haven't been in one of these in forever! 426 00:17:52,947 --> 00:17:54,699 - They wanted me to go to the bachelorette party 427 00:17:54,783 --> 00:17:55,867 with the girls. 428 00:17:55,909 --> 00:17:57,994 Really? Such a clich�. 429 00:17:58,161 --> 00:17:59,788 I'm a man. 430 00:17:59,871 --> 00:18:02,957 So I'm going to the bachelor party with the boys. 431 00:18:02,999 --> 00:18:06,044 I just have to remember how I acted before I came out. 432 00:18:07,170 --> 00:18:08,963 Wassuuuuup! 433 00:18:14,886 --> 00:18:16,262 - Wait, why are we stopping? 434 00:18:16,304 --> 00:18:17,597 Jim, this isn't on the itinerary. 435 00:18:17,681 --> 00:18:18,890 - Dwight. - Jim, what-- 436 00:18:18,932 --> 00:18:21,393 - Get out. - Come on! What-- 437 00:18:23,770 --> 00:18:25,855 what, are you gonna whack me, Jim? 438 00:18:25,897 --> 00:18:27,357 - No, Dwight. 439 00:18:27,440 --> 00:18:28,983 You'll be doing the whacking. 440 00:18:34,406 --> 00:18:36,324 - A bazooka. 441 00:18:36,449 --> 00:18:39,202 You remembered. - Of course I did. 442 00:18:39,244 --> 00:18:41,496 [tearful laugh] 443 00:18:41,663 --> 00:18:42,789 Get outta my way. 444 00:18:43,957 --> 00:18:45,333 all: Oh! 445 00:18:45,417 --> 00:18:47,794 [laughter, applause] 446 00:18:47,919 --> 00:18:49,879 - Whoo! - Yeah! 447 00:18:49,963 --> 00:18:51,172 - Okay! 448 00:18:51,297 --> 00:18:53,216 - Guten prank number two. 449 00:18:53,258 --> 00:18:55,927 [all cheering] 450 00:18:57,178 --> 00:18:58,346 - Private room. 451 00:18:58,430 --> 00:19:00,890 - Yeah, broseph. - Amazing! 452 00:19:00,932 --> 00:19:02,267 - Enjoy, enjoy. 453 00:19:02,350 --> 00:19:03,977 - Hey, I know you. 454 00:19:04,060 --> 00:19:05,311 You gonna sit here and cry? 455 00:19:05,353 --> 00:19:07,647 - Okay, man, easy. - [feigning tears] 456 00:19:07,772 --> 00:19:09,274 - Hey, dude, leave him alone. What are you doing? 457 00:19:09,357 --> 00:19:10,734 - Jim, it's fine. 458 00:19:10,859 --> 00:19:11,943 He'll just get you on his cell phone, 459 00:19:11,985 --> 00:19:14,320 and then that'll go viral. 460 00:19:14,362 --> 00:19:16,531 - That happens a lot? - Yeah, I guess. 461 00:19:16,614 --> 00:19:19,409 But things are going well, actually. 462 00:19:19,492 --> 00:19:21,661 I spoke at Cornell during commencement week. 463 00:19:23,455 --> 00:19:24,956 I mean, the seniors invited me as a joke, 464 00:19:24,998 --> 00:19:27,459 but it was a huge success. 465 00:19:27,500 --> 00:19:29,419 - Well, I bet it was a smash. 466 00:19:29,461 --> 00:19:31,212 That's how I got my new job in the admissions office. 467 00:19:31,296 --> 00:19:33,214 - Is that a volunteer program or... 468 00:19:33,381 --> 00:19:36,968 - No. It's a job. 469 00:19:37,010 --> 00:19:38,678 Things are going great. 470 00:19:38,720 --> 00:19:40,055 - Let's get a drink in you, huh? 471 00:19:40,096 --> 00:19:41,973 - Yes! 472 00:19:42,098 --> 00:19:44,934 - Whoo-hoo! Let's get this party started! 473 00:19:44,976 --> 00:19:46,353 - Where's my angel? 474 00:19:46,436 --> 00:19:48,355 [both squealing, laughing] 475 00:19:48,396 --> 00:19:50,106 - This is my big sister Rachel. 476 00:19:50,231 --> 00:19:52,567 - No, this is my big sister Angela. 477 00:19:52,650 --> 00:19:55,487 - [laughs] We're very close. 478 00:19:55,570 --> 00:19:57,280 We even have our own special language. 479 00:19:57,364 --> 00:20:00,283 - [speaking in indistinct language] 480 00:20:00,325 --> 00:20:01,951 [both laughing] 481 00:20:01,993 --> 00:20:03,995 - People love it. 482 00:20:04,120 --> 00:20:05,955 - They do. 483 00:20:06,039 --> 00:20:07,207 - [sighs] 484 00:20:07,248 --> 00:20:09,209 Guys, I think I'm getting cold feet. 485 00:20:09,292 --> 00:20:11,461 - Okay, well, I can't say I'm surprised. 486 00:20:11,503 --> 00:20:13,254 - Didn't I call it? 487 00:20:13,338 --> 00:20:14,381 - Angela, I just want you to know 488 00:20:14,506 --> 00:20:16,383 that is a perfectly normal thing to feel 489 00:20:16,466 --> 00:20:18,051 the night before a wedding. 490 00:20:18,134 --> 00:20:19,761 To Dwight. 491 00:20:19,803 --> 00:20:21,388 - No! 492 00:20:21,471 --> 00:20:24,391 My feet are cold, literally. 493 00:20:24,516 --> 00:20:27,185 I mean, I'm a small person with poor circulation. 494 00:20:27,310 --> 00:20:28,228 God! 495 00:20:30,647 --> 00:20:32,565 - Well, isn't somebody gonna get her a blanket? 496 00:20:34,192 --> 00:20:36,111 [speaking in indistinct language] 497 00:20:36,194 --> 00:20:37,654 - What? - [sighs] 498 00:20:37,737 --> 00:20:40,407 - [sighs] Man, how long have we been sitting here? 499 00:20:40,490 --> 00:20:42,033 - Hi, boys! 500 00:20:42,075 --> 00:20:43,827 all: Ooh... - Here we go! 501 00:20:43,952 --> 00:20:46,538 - Oh, thank God. We are famished! 502 00:20:46,663 --> 00:20:50,041 - Hey, did somebody order the chef special? 503 00:20:50,125 --> 00:20:51,418 - Right there. - Right here. 504 00:20:51,459 --> 00:20:52,544 - No, we haven't ordered anything. 505 00:20:52,627 --> 00:20:54,295 No one's even taken our drinks. 506 00:20:54,421 --> 00:20:55,797 Uh, what is the chef special? 507 00:20:55,922 --> 00:20:57,257 [Rihanna's "SandM" playing] 508 00:20:57,340 --> 00:21:01,136 - I bet you boys have a big appetite. 509 00:21:01,219 --> 00:21:02,971 - Oh, we do. 510 00:21:03,096 --> 00:21:05,432 So we'll have an onion loaf for the table, please. 511 00:21:05,515 --> 00:21:08,309 And tell us about your heartiest soups. 512 00:21:08,435 --> 00:21:11,813 - Mm, I know what you want. I know exactly what you want. 513 00:21:11,938 --> 00:21:14,357 - Yes, an onion loaf for the table. 514 00:21:14,399 --> 00:21:15,483 But that's not all. 515 00:21:15,608 --> 00:21:16,735 Now the chef special sounded good. 516 00:21:16,901 --> 00:21:19,779 What is it exactly? - Ooh. Shh. 517 00:21:19,863 --> 00:21:21,031 - Okay, what are you doing? 518 00:21:21,114 --> 00:21:22,574 Are you giving me a taste of the chef special? 519 00:21:22,699 --> 00:21:24,242 - Mm-hmm. - Hmm? 520 00:21:24,325 --> 00:21:25,869 Tastes like cigarettes. 521 00:21:25,994 --> 00:21:28,955 That won't work. That's no good. 522 00:21:29,080 --> 00:21:30,665 - Whoo! - What? 523 00:21:30,790 --> 00:21:32,542 [laughter] [knock at door] 524 00:21:32,625 --> 00:21:34,336 - Okay. - Oh, boy. 525 00:21:36,379 --> 00:21:38,506 - Oh! 526 00:21:38,590 --> 00:21:39,841 - Heard you guys needed some pipes fixed, 527 00:21:39,966 --> 00:21:42,177 or cleaned or whatever. 528 00:21:42,260 --> 00:21:44,179 Angela's special repair man is here. 529 00:21:44,262 --> 00:21:45,430 - Wait, what is this? 530 00:21:45,513 --> 00:21:47,515 - Shut up. Jakey? 531 00:21:48,850 --> 00:21:50,727 - Mom? - Wait. Wait. 532 00:21:50,769 --> 00:21:52,896 What? - Oh, man. 533 00:21:52,979 --> 00:21:54,272 - No, no, no, no. Just do your work. 534 00:21:54,314 --> 00:21:55,482 Pretend Mom's not here. 535 00:21:55,523 --> 00:21:57,567 - Uh... - That seems inappropriate. 536 00:21:57,609 --> 00:21:59,819 - Give 'em a good show, my little entrepreneur. 537 00:21:59,903 --> 00:22:01,571 - Okay. - Take it off. 538 00:22:01,654 --> 00:22:03,823 [Big and Rich's "Save a Horse (Ride a Cowboy)" playing] 539 00:22:03,865 --> 00:22:06,076 - Yeah! Good song choice, Jakey. 540 00:22:06,201 --> 00:22:07,744 Stripper's only as good as his song. 541 00:22:07,827 --> 00:22:09,079 - Whoa. 542 00:22:09,120 --> 00:22:10,163 [shrieking] 543 00:22:10,330 --> 00:22:11,581 - Oh! 544 00:22:11,706 --> 00:22:15,210 ? ? 545 00:22:15,251 --> 00:22:16,836 - Oh. 546 00:22:16,961 --> 00:22:19,631 Oh, wowee-wow. 547 00:22:19,714 --> 00:22:20,882 - Okay. 548 00:22:21,007 --> 00:22:22,258 - ? Well, I walk into the room ? 549 00:22:22,384 --> 00:22:23,426 - Whoo! - Whoo-hoo! 550 00:22:23,510 --> 00:22:24,427 - ? Passin' out $100 bills ? 551 00:22:24,511 --> 00:22:27,180 - Go, Meredith's stripper son. 552 00:22:27,263 --> 00:22:28,682 all: Ohh! - Oh! 553 00:22:28,848 --> 00:22:30,809 Rachel, are you all right? - I don't know! 554 00:22:30,850 --> 00:22:31,768 I don't know. - Oh, jeez-- 555 00:22:31,851 --> 00:22:33,353 - Oh, my God! 556 00:22:33,436 --> 00:22:35,105 - Be gentle, Jakey, gentle. 557 00:22:35,188 --> 00:22:36,731 Just a second. 558 00:22:36,856 --> 00:22:38,733 Just one second. Look. 559 00:22:38,817 --> 00:22:41,027 - Okay, if anything, this is rougher! 560 00:22:41,111 --> 00:22:42,779 Stop it, Meredith! 561 00:22:42,904 --> 00:22:45,240 - Fine. My bad! Go ahead, Jakey! 562 00:22:45,365 --> 00:22:47,450 - Uh, no. It's o--thank you. 563 00:22:47,534 --> 00:22:48,785 You know what? You don't have to-- 564 00:22:48,827 --> 00:22:49,911 Oh! No, no, no. 565 00:22:50,036 --> 00:22:51,287 No, no, no. It's okay. 566 00:22:51,413 --> 00:22:52,789 - Now, for the last time, 567 00:22:52,914 --> 00:22:54,582 I'd like a side salad with balsamic. 568 00:22:54,708 --> 00:22:56,960 - Dwight, for the last time, she's not a waitress. 569 00:22:57,002 --> 00:22:58,545 - You're telling me! 570 00:22:58,712 --> 00:23:00,463 - If you want her to leave, just tip her. 571 00:23:00,588 --> 00:23:03,174 - What for? We haven't even gotten bread yet. 572 00:23:03,299 --> 00:23:05,635 Does anyone wanna split a twice baked potato? 573 00:23:05,719 --> 00:23:08,930 Do you have those? Those aren't deep fried, right? 574 00:23:09,055 --> 00:23:10,432 - That was interesting. 575 00:23:10,557 --> 00:23:11,808 - [sighs] [creaking] 576 00:23:11,933 --> 00:23:13,935 What was that? - It's just the wind. 577 00:23:14,019 --> 00:23:16,354 - Will you lock the door? - Okay. 578 00:23:16,438 --> 00:23:19,357 - [sighs] 579 00:23:19,524 --> 00:23:21,109 - It's just the wind, see? Nothing. 580 00:23:21,234 --> 00:23:22,527 - All right, you know, 581 00:23:22,610 --> 00:23:24,362 you don't have to leave the door wide open. 582 00:23:24,446 --> 00:23:25,655 We get it. It's the wind. 583 00:23:25,739 --> 00:23:26,990 Just come and shut--oh, my God! 584 00:23:27,032 --> 00:23:28,908 [all screaming] 585 00:23:28,992 --> 00:23:30,535 - Phyllis! - What's happening? 586 00:23:34,664 --> 00:23:35,749 - Oh, man, never thought I'd say this, 587 00:23:35,832 --> 00:23:37,250 but I think I ate too much bone marrow. 588 00:23:37,334 --> 00:23:39,044 [phone ringing] - Oh, it's the girls. 589 00:23:39,127 --> 00:23:41,629 Hey, Pam. What? 590 00:23:41,713 --> 00:23:43,757 Angela's been kidnapped! 591 00:23:43,882 --> 00:23:45,633 Phyllis left the door open, 592 00:23:45,759 --> 00:23:47,761 and some freak came and grabbed her and fled. 593 00:23:47,886 --> 00:23:50,555 - Good old Mose. [laughing] 594 00:23:50,638 --> 00:23:52,682 - They think it was Mose. 595 00:23:52,766 --> 00:23:54,768 - Oh, great, he's getting into the spirit of the festivities. 596 00:23:54,851 --> 00:23:56,061 Fantastic. 597 00:23:56,144 --> 00:23:57,729 He just pulled off a braut entfuhrung. 598 00:23:57,812 --> 00:23:58,980 - What is that? 599 00:23:59,064 --> 00:24:00,857 - A ceremonial bridal kidnapping. 600 00:24:00,940 --> 00:24:04,069 He will take the bride and hide her at a local pub. 601 00:24:04,194 --> 00:24:07,030 And when I find the place, I have to buy everyone drinks. 602 00:24:07,113 --> 00:24:09,657 Ah. All right! Oh, Mose! 603 00:24:09,741 --> 00:24:10,700 - Wait a minute. 604 00:24:10,784 --> 00:24:11,743 You said the tradition is 605 00:24:11,826 --> 00:24:13,036 for the groom to search for her, 606 00:24:13,078 --> 00:24:14,829 and it ends at a pub. 607 00:24:14,871 --> 00:24:18,458 So how about the last pub you'd ever set foot in in this town? 608 00:24:18,541 --> 00:24:19,959 - Right. Which one is that? 609 00:24:20,043 --> 00:24:22,170 - Mm, hey, driver, why don't you take us 610 00:24:22,295 --> 00:24:25,090 to 3030 Adams? 611 00:24:30,178 --> 00:24:34,015 Is that Mose? - Yes, it is! 612 00:24:34,140 --> 00:24:36,476 I am here for my bride! - [giggles] 613 00:24:36,601 --> 00:24:38,478 Well, first, buy us a drink. 614 00:24:38,561 --> 00:24:40,814 all: ? If you want your bride, buy us a drink ? 615 00:24:40,939 --> 00:24:43,316 ? If you want your bride, buy us a drink ? 616 00:24:43,400 --> 00:24:45,110 - Very well! Drinks on me! 617 00:24:45,235 --> 00:24:47,404 [all cheering] Bartender! 618 00:24:47,487 --> 00:24:49,656 [gasps] 619 00:24:49,698 --> 00:24:53,535 - Well, well, well, well, well. 620 00:24:53,576 --> 00:24:56,579 That's six "wells." 621 00:24:56,621 --> 00:25:00,166 Did I get that number right, Dwight? 622 00:25:00,250 --> 00:25:02,377 - I heard you bought a bar, Kevin. 623 00:25:02,460 --> 00:25:04,879 - Yes. I did. 624 00:25:05,005 --> 00:25:06,047 This one. 625 00:25:06,131 --> 00:25:08,133 Well, after the documentary aired, 626 00:25:08,258 --> 00:25:10,760 people wanted to buy me a drink. 627 00:25:10,844 --> 00:25:12,846 It became kind of a thing. 628 00:25:12,971 --> 00:25:14,764 But I don't drink that much, 629 00:25:14,848 --> 00:25:19,728 so I ended up with a $16,000 credit. 630 00:25:19,853 --> 00:25:22,313 It was cheaper to make me a partner. 631 00:25:22,397 --> 00:25:26,192 And I doubled the business, so-- 632 00:25:26,234 --> 00:25:29,696 for non-accountants, that means I timesed it by two. 633 00:25:31,156 --> 00:25:32,574 Now get out! 634 00:25:34,743 --> 00:25:37,704 - Why did you pick this place? - Ohh. 635 00:25:37,787 --> 00:25:39,456 - You? 636 00:25:39,581 --> 00:25:41,833 You did this as a prank. My own bestisch mensch. 637 00:25:41,958 --> 00:25:43,626 - Nope, not a prank. 638 00:25:43,752 --> 00:25:45,378 I think it's time for you to bury the hatchet. 639 00:25:45,420 --> 00:25:46,713 - [scoffs] Waste of a good hatchet. 640 00:25:46,796 --> 00:25:49,257 - Okay, just talk. 641 00:25:51,676 --> 00:25:52,886 - Well, w-- 642 00:25:52,969 --> 00:25:54,804 - I heard you say "well" the first time. 643 00:25:54,888 --> 00:25:56,931 - I know Dwight misses Kevin. 644 00:25:57,015 --> 00:26:00,393 I saw him making his portrait out of a Wooly Willy. 645 00:26:00,477 --> 00:26:02,228 Tomorrow's his wedding day. 646 00:26:02,270 --> 00:26:04,731 You can't be anything but happy on your wedding day. 647 00:26:04,814 --> 00:26:06,816 - It was nothing personal. 648 00:26:06,941 --> 00:26:09,110 It's just that you were terrible at your job. 649 00:26:09,194 --> 00:26:11,071 - You're just saying that to make me feel better. 650 00:26:11,154 --> 00:26:13,531 - No, really, you were terrible at math 651 00:26:13,615 --> 00:26:16,284 and organization, time management, 652 00:26:16,368 --> 00:26:17,869 personal hygiene. 653 00:26:17,952 --> 00:26:19,412 Your internet searches were so filthy 654 00:26:19,537 --> 00:26:21,331 we had to throw out your computer. 655 00:26:21,373 --> 00:26:23,291 - Is that all it was? 656 00:26:23,375 --> 00:26:24,709 - That's it. 657 00:26:26,711 --> 00:26:28,338 - Come here. 658 00:26:28,421 --> 00:26:29,881 - I missed you, Kevin. 659 00:26:29,923 --> 00:26:32,425 - I missed you! - Ohh. 660 00:26:32,550 --> 00:26:35,053 - Guten prank. - Yes, Mose. 661 00:26:35,136 --> 00:26:37,305 Guten prank number three. 662 00:26:40,475 --> 00:26:42,811 - You've had your drink. Now where is my bride? 663 00:26:42,894 --> 00:26:44,521 [all cheering] 664 00:26:44,604 --> 00:26:47,524 Mose! What... 665 00:26:47,649 --> 00:26:49,943 ohh, Mose. 666 00:26:50,068 --> 00:26:51,778 - What the [bleep] is your problem, 667 00:26:51,903 --> 00:26:53,988 you [bleep] [bleep] [bleep]? 668 00:26:58,576 --> 00:27:00,495 - Hey, is Angela coming, or-- 669 00:27:00,620 --> 00:27:02,831 - No. We can't see each other on our wedding day. 670 00:27:02,914 --> 00:27:04,708 And her legs are still numb from being in the trunk. 671 00:27:04,791 --> 00:27:06,501 - Right. - Hey, guys. 672 00:27:06,584 --> 00:27:08,211 all: Stanley! 673 00:27:08,294 --> 00:27:10,755 - How's Florida? - Oh, great. 674 00:27:10,839 --> 00:27:12,716 Yes, I'm living in Florida now. 675 00:27:12,757 --> 00:27:14,676 Little town called Florida City, 676 00:27:14,801 --> 00:27:16,970 just on the edge of the Everglades. 677 00:27:17,053 --> 00:27:18,763 The man who delivered my divorce papers 678 00:27:18,847 --> 00:27:22,308 came by fan boat, which was kinda fun. 679 00:27:22,392 --> 00:27:26,146 I sit on my porch all day, carving birds. 680 00:27:26,229 --> 00:27:27,022 - Stanley, you coming to the wedding? 681 00:27:27,105 --> 00:27:28,148 - Of course. 682 00:27:28,189 --> 00:27:29,524 Never thought the day would come 683 00:27:29,607 --> 00:27:30,984 when an American woman would agree to be your wife. 684 00:27:31,067 --> 00:27:33,361 - Oh, you're incorrigible. 685 00:27:33,486 --> 00:27:35,321 - I hope you have better luck with it than I did. 686 00:27:35,405 --> 00:27:37,282 [laughter] 687 00:27:37,365 --> 00:27:38,658 - Am I the only one that's nervous? 688 00:27:38,742 --> 00:27:40,535 [chuckles] How are you doing with this? 689 00:27:40,577 --> 00:27:43,204 Should we have bailed? - No, no, I'm fine. 690 00:27:43,329 --> 00:27:45,623 - Doesn't seem like anyone cares about us anyway. 691 00:27:47,375 --> 00:27:51,880 - I guess this was worth being filmed nonstop for nine years. 692 00:27:51,921 --> 00:27:54,758 - I'm sorry, guys. This is probably on me. 693 00:27:54,841 --> 00:27:57,844 I got hated on pretty hard when that auto-tune went viral. 694 00:27:57,927 --> 00:28:00,847 ? Just sit here and cry, just sit here and cry ? 695 00:28:00,930 --> 00:28:03,767 ? Oh, I can so just sit here and cry ? 696 00:28:03,850 --> 00:28:05,810 ? You guys are really mean ? 697 00:28:05,894 --> 00:28:07,437 ? It can't end like this, you know ? 698 00:28:07,520 --> 00:28:09,105 ? Slept in my car last night, quit my job ? 699 00:28:09,189 --> 00:28:10,357 ? Burned all my bridges ? 700 00:28:10,482 --> 00:28:12,317 ? And I did unspeakable things ? 701 00:28:12,442 --> 00:28:13,943 - ? You're just not good ? 702 00:28:14,027 --> 00:28:15,320 ? You're just not good ? 703 00:28:15,403 --> 00:28:16,696 - ? Are you insane? ? 704 00:28:16,821 --> 00:28:18,490 - ? You're just not good ? 705 00:28:18,531 --> 00:28:19,866 ? You're just not good ? 706 00:28:19,991 --> 00:28:21,659 - ? Chill out ? [crying] 707 00:28:21,743 --> 00:28:23,495 - [giggling] - ? Just sit here and cry ? 708 00:28:23,578 --> 00:28:26,081 - People actually dance to this. 709 00:28:26,164 --> 00:28:28,500 It's in my jukebox. 710 00:28:28,583 --> 00:28:31,127 None of the money goes to Andy, though. 711 00:28:31,211 --> 00:28:33,421 - ? Cry, cry, cry ? 712 00:28:33,505 --> 00:28:37,467 - [laughing] Yeah, people hate you. 713 00:28:37,550 --> 00:28:40,762 - I'll go talk to the manager. Maybe we should just go home. 714 00:28:46,601 --> 00:28:48,603 - Hey, it's Andy Bernard. 715 00:28:48,687 --> 00:28:50,647 - Nard dog! - Nard dog! 716 00:28:50,689 --> 00:28:53,024 [cheers and applause] 717 00:28:53,149 --> 00:28:54,651 - Roo-doo-doo-doo! 718 00:28:54,734 --> 00:28:56,861 all: Roo-doo-doo-doo-doo! 719 00:28:56,986 --> 00:28:58,780 Roo-doo-doo-doo-doo! 720 00:28:58,822 --> 00:29:00,615 Roo-doo-doo-doo-doo! 721 00:29:00,699 --> 00:29:02,659 Roo-doo-doo-doo-doo! 722 00:29:02,742 --> 00:29:04,494 - Roo-doo-doo-doo-doo! 723 00:29:04,577 --> 00:29:07,455 [cheers and applause] 724 00:29:12,293 --> 00:29:14,004 - How did it feel to see your lives 725 00:29:14,129 --> 00:29:15,588 played out on TV? 726 00:29:15,630 --> 00:29:16,464 - It's like seeing a documentary 727 00:29:16,548 --> 00:29:18,216 about how your food is made. 728 00:29:18,258 --> 00:29:19,843 It's kinda disgusting. 729 00:29:19,968 --> 00:29:23,054 You learn a lot, but I didn't wanna know any of it. 730 00:29:23,138 --> 00:29:25,640 - With today's modern surveillance technology, 731 00:29:25,765 --> 00:29:29,477 we are in a constant state of being watched, 732 00:29:29,561 --> 00:29:30,937 whether it's our government 733 00:29:30,979 --> 00:29:32,313 or the government of other countries, 734 00:29:32,397 --> 00:29:34,024 A.K.A. Google. 735 00:29:34,065 --> 00:29:36,985 You guys are being filmed way more than we ever were. 736 00:29:37,068 --> 00:29:39,070 - Uh, no one recognizes me. 737 00:29:39,154 --> 00:29:41,072 But now all my friends call me Plop. 738 00:29:41,114 --> 00:29:44,159 So... thanks, PBS. [laughter] 739 00:29:44,200 --> 00:29:47,328 - Uh, Jim, that DVD in the last episode 740 00:29:47,454 --> 00:29:49,289 was so romantic. 741 00:29:49,330 --> 00:29:51,708 And, um, I think we'd all love to know, 742 00:29:51,875 --> 00:29:55,378 Pam, what romantic thing did you do to pay Jim back 743 00:29:55,420 --> 00:29:57,005 for leaving Athlead? 744 00:29:57,047 --> 00:30:00,050 - Well, I mean, how do you pay back someone 745 00:30:00,133 --> 00:30:02,677 for something like that? 746 00:30:02,719 --> 00:30:06,723 But, uh, I don't know. I'm working on something. 747 00:30:06,848 --> 00:30:09,267 - She pays me back every day, just by being my wife. 748 00:30:09,351 --> 00:30:10,518 So that's fine. 749 00:30:10,685 --> 00:30:12,562 all: Aww. 750 00:30:12,645 --> 00:30:14,981 - O-kay. 751 00:30:15,148 --> 00:30:17,984 - All I can say is, if I had Jim, 752 00:30:18,068 --> 00:30:21,112 he would have a free pass to do anything. 753 00:30:21,154 --> 00:30:23,448 I mean, if I lucked into that, 754 00:30:23,615 --> 00:30:25,575 he could do anything-- 755 00:30:25,617 --> 00:30:27,202 anything. 756 00:30:29,037 --> 00:30:30,622 - I'm sorry, is there a question? 757 00:30:30,705 --> 00:30:33,291 - Uh, no. 758 00:30:34,751 --> 00:30:37,170 - Pam, what was in that teapot letter? 759 00:30:37,337 --> 00:30:39,756 - Oh, um, well, you know, I-- 760 00:30:39,798 --> 00:30:43,593 I just--I think I would rather keep that private. 761 00:30:43,677 --> 00:30:45,929 You know, if you'd been filmed for nine years of your life, 762 00:30:46,012 --> 00:30:48,098 there'd be some things that you just wanna keep to yourself. 763 00:30:48,139 --> 00:30:49,099 - I hear ya. 764 00:30:49,140 --> 00:30:50,975 What did it say? 765 00:30:52,018 --> 00:30:53,269 - We're gonna move on. 766 00:30:53,353 --> 00:30:54,896 Next question, please. 767 00:30:55,021 --> 00:30:57,357 - Do you find that your life feels pointless 768 00:30:57,440 --> 00:30:59,567 now that nobody's actually filming you anymore? 769 00:30:59,609 --> 00:31:01,403 - Yes. 770 00:31:04,406 --> 00:31:06,908 - I wanna know how everyone felt they were portrayed. 771 00:31:06,991 --> 00:31:07,992 Was it accurate? 772 00:31:08,034 --> 00:31:09,327 - I got a beef with that. 773 00:31:09,369 --> 00:31:11,579 Um, for the first seven years, 774 00:31:11,621 --> 00:31:13,331 I was getting my PhD in school psychology, 775 00:31:13,498 --> 00:31:14,749 and they didn't show it. 776 00:31:14,833 --> 00:31:16,668 Yes, I was getting hammered. 777 00:31:16,710 --> 00:31:19,254 But, hey, it was college. 778 00:31:21,256 --> 00:31:23,967 - This is a question for Oscar. 779 00:31:24,009 --> 00:31:26,469 I think we all want to know if you're still single. 780 00:31:26,636 --> 00:31:29,139 [cheering] 781 00:31:29,305 --> 00:31:31,224 - Yes, I am. 782 00:31:31,307 --> 00:31:33,393 - Good, 'cause my friend here really likes you. 783 00:31:38,023 --> 00:31:40,734 - Darryl, are you dating anyone in Austin right now? 784 00:31:40,775 --> 00:31:44,946 - Well, I have a pretty good wing man, Dr. J. 785 00:31:45,030 --> 00:31:48,867 We're actually going to the NBA finals next month. 786 00:31:48,908 --> 00:31:50,452 As far as dating, though, 787 00:31:50,535 --> 00:31:52,579 I'm keeping my options open. 788 00:31:52,746 --> 00:31:53,997 - How did being in the documentary 789 00:31:54,080 --> 00:31:55,665 change your behavior? 790 00:31:55,790 --> 00:31:58,960 - I have never cared what other people thought of me. 791 00:31:59,085 --> 00:32:00,962 - I just want to say that it's really nice 792 00:32:01,004 --> 00:32:04,382 to be in this room, where I'm remembered for 793 00:32:04,549 --> 00:32:07,344 all sides of me, uh, 794 00:32:07,510 --> 00:32:09,929 all the moments over the years, the good and the bad. 795 00:32:10,013 --> 00:32:11,723 - Uh-oh, baby's gonna cry! 796 00:32:11,890 --> 00:32:12,807 [all shushing] - Shut up. 797 00:32:12,849 --> 00:32:15,018 - Shut up. 798 00:32:15,060 --> 00:32:17,854 - [laughs] A lot of crowds wouldn't have shushed. 799 00:32:17,896 --> 00:32:19,981 Good old PBS. 800 00:32:20,065 --> 00:32:23,318 Too bad they get 1 millionth of ratings on the internet. 801 00:32:23,401 --> 00:32:24,486 - Jennie Tan. 802 00:32:24,652 --> 00:32:26,237 I ran a website devoted to your show. 803 00:32:26,363 --> 00:32:28,365 I have a question for Jim and Pam. 804 00:32:28,406 --> 00:32:31,910 Everyone watching sees how much you love each other 805 00:32:32,035 --> 00:32:34,454 and how you're soul mates. 806 00:32:34,496 --> 00:32:36,790 So, Pam, how could you doubt that 807 00:32:36,831 --> 00:32:39,084 when Jim moved to Philadelphia? 808 00:32:39,125 --> 00:32:42,045 - Um, you know what, I actually didn't handle that move, uh, 809 00:32:42,128 --> 00:32:43,713 very gracefully, 810 00:32:43,755 --> 00:32:47,258 from not communicating to being a little selfish. 811 00:32:47,342 --> 00:32:49,094 - Listen, um... 812 00:32:49,135 --> 00:32:52,180 I was scared, you know? 813 00:32:52,263 --> 00:32:55,266 I loved what I had, and I didn't wanna risk it. 814 00:32:55,350 --> 00:33:00,563 And I think that maybe I did doubt him a little too. 815 00:33:00,605 --> 00:33:04,192 Which was wrong, because he's shown me time and again. 816 00:33:04,234 --> 00:33:05,860 But when the documentary started airing, 817 00:33:05,944 --> 00:33:07,320 people on the street told me 818 00:33:07,362 --> 00:33:10,198 that I had this fairy-tale romance. 819 00:33:10,365 --> 00:33:12,158 But there were a lot of times last year 820 00:33:12,242 --> 00:33:15,328 when it did not feel like a fairy tale. 821 00:33:15,370 --> 00:33:18,998 But then it got deeper, and it got stronger, 822 00:33:19,082 --> 00:33:21,876 and now it's better than a fairy tale. 823 00:33:21,960 --> 00:33:26,172 It's like a long book that you never want to end. 824 00:33:26,256 --> 00:33:27,757 And you're fine with that, 825 00:33:27,882 --> 00:33:30,635 because you just never, ever wanna leave it. 826 00:33:30,719 --> 00:33:32,303 all: Aww. 827 00:33:32,470 --> 00:33:34,681 - Like "Harry Potter." 828 00:33:34,806 --> 00:33:37,183 - Yeah, like "Harry Potter." 829 00:33:37,350 --> 00:33:40,228 - I have a question for Erin. 830 00:33:40,270 --> 00:33:42,397 - Really? - Yes. 831 00:33:42,564 --> 00:33:45,650 Um, the thing I found most compelling 832 00:33:45,692 --> 00:33:50,113 about the documentary was your search for your birth mother. 833 00:33:50,155 --> 00:33:51,948 - Thank you. 834 00:33:52,991 --> 00:33:57,454 - So my question is, um, do--don't you hate her? 835 00:33:57,537 --> 00:34:01,166 I mean, I would just imagine that you were so angry at her 836 00:34:01,207 --> 00:34:02,876 that you would hate her. 837 00:34:04,961 --> 00:34:06,338 - Maybe sometimes. 838 00:34:06,379 --> 00:34:09,507 But not like hate hate. 839 00:34:09,549 --> 00:34:13,094 More just like, "Mom, I hate you!" 840 00:34:13,136 --> 00:34:16,931 And then she would say, "Go to your room, young lady." 841 00:34:16,973 --> 00:34:19,267 And I'd stamp my foot and run upstairs. 842 00:34:19,309 --> 00:34:22,270 And I have a room, which is really cool. 843 00:34:22,312 --> 00:34:25,273 And then we'd just have dinner together. 844 00:34:25,440 --> 00:34:26,608 But I don't know. I'd have to meet her. 845 00:34:26,691 --> 00:34:27,942 [laughs] Thanks. 846 00:34:31,613 --> 00:34:33,448 - Erin... 847 00:34:33,573 --> 00:34:34,699 - Yes? 848 00:34:36,785 --> 00:34:38,661 - Um... 849 00:34:38,703 --> 00:34:41,956 oh, Erin... 850 00:34:43,792 --> 00:34:46,753 - Yes? Is there a follow-up question? 851 00:34:54,010 --> 00:34:54,969 Mom? 852 00:34:57,972 --> 00:34:59,474 all: Aww. 853 00:34:59,516 --> 00:35:02,268 [applause] 854 00:35:08,817 --> 00:35:10,193 - Erin... 855 00:35:10,276 --> 00:35:13,071 same question, but about your dad? 856 00:35:14,364 --> 00:35:16,783 - [laughs] 857 00:35:19,202 --> 00:35:21,996 - Well, this feels like a good place to stop. 858 00:35:22,122 --> 00:35:23,915 Let's thank all of our wonderful panelists 859 00:35:23,998 --> 00:35:27,252 for being here on this wonderful panel today. 860 00:35:33,466 --> 00:35:35,552 Next week at the Scranton Cultural Center, 861 00:35:35,677 --> 00:35:38,596 don't forget, Irish step dancing semifinals. 862 00:35:38,638 --> 00:35:40,932 Winning team to mid-Atlantic. 863 00:35:41,099 --> 00:35:43,977 [cheers and applause] 864 00:35:58,491 --> 00:36:00,493 - Where's the, uh, basket for gifts? 865 00:36:00,535 --> 00:36:03,580 - Right there, sir. - Okay. 866 00:36:03,621 --> 00:36:05,790 - Hi. I'm Dakota. 867 00:36:05,874 --> 00:36:07,083 - Jeff Bomondo. 868 00:36:07,167 --> 00:36:08,585 I sell ceramic tile out of Newark. 869 00:36:08,710 --> 00:36:10,420 - Nice. - My wife's name is Kathryn. 870 00:36:10,545 --> 00:36:12,088 I can show you my social security card, 871 00:36:12,130 --> 00:36:14,507 if it helps. 872 00:36:14,632 --> 00:36:16,217 [cat meowing] 873 00:36:17,761 --> 00:36:18,762 - Ugh. 874 00:36:18,803 --> 00:36:20,138 Look at this mud. 875 00:36:20,263 --> 00:36:22,057 Can you imagine if I had worn my Jimmy Choos? 876 00:36:22,140 --> 00:36:24,184 I just saved you 600 bucks, mister. 877 00:36:24,267 --> 00:36:25,226 - Thanks for helping out, sweetie. 878 00:36:25,268 --> 00:36:26,603 - Mm. 879 00:36:26,686 --> 00:36:28,813 - Kelly. You're here. 880 00:36:28,855 --> 00:36:32,150 - Hey, Ryan! - Hey. 881 00:36:32,233 --> 00:36:34,152 - Whose baby is this? Oh, are you, like, a manny now? 882 00:36:34,235 --> 00:36:37,655 - No, this little guy is mine. 883 00:36:37,781 --> 00:36:39,824 So I was dating this girl, and one day, 884 00:36:39,991 --> 00:36:41,451 she went out to get a new charger 885 00:36:41,493 --> 00:36:42,952 for her e-cigarette. 886 00:36:43,036 --> 00:36:45,330 Never came back. 887 00:36:45,413 --> 00:36:46,956 Oldest story in the book. 888 00:36:46,998 --> 00:36:48,208 [baby squeals] 889 00:36:48,333 --> 00:36:49,459 Say "hi," Drake. 890 00:36:49,584 --> 00:36:51,378 - Drake is your baby's name? - Yeah. 891 00:36:51,503 --> 00:36:53,254 - That is an amazing name. I'm obsessed with Drake. 892 00:36:53,338 --> 00:36:54,798 [Drake babbles] His last album, 893 00:36:54,881 --> 00:36:56,257 it just touched me to pieces. 894 00:36:56,341 --> 00:36:57,342 - No, Kelly, he's not named 895 00:36:57,509 --> 00:36:58,718 after a hip-hop artist from 2011. 896 00:36:58,885 --> 00:37:01,137 It's Drake, like a mix of Drew and Blake. 897 00:37:01,221 --> 00:37:03,098 - Cool. 898 00:37:03,264 --> 00:37:06,518 Well, he is so cute. Ravi, check out this cute baby. 899 00:37:06,601 --> 00:37:07,852 I'm obsessed with him. - Oh? 900 00:37:07,894 --> 00:37:09,229 - Ravi is a pediatrician. 901 00:37:09,270 --> 00:37:11,606 And some of his patients are total uggos. 902 00:37:11,690 --> 00:37:13,191 - They're called premature, sweetie. 903 00:37:13,274 --> 00:37:14,484 - Yeah. 904 00:37:14,609 --> 00:37:17,153 - It's good to see you again, Ryan. 905 00:37:17,278 --> 00:37:19,072 - Let me help you up. - Thanks. 906 00:37:19,197 --> 00:37:21,074 - Ooh! Oh! - Ow! 907 00:37:21,199 --> 00:37:22,826 - Oh, boy, maybe your heels are too high. 908 00:37:22,951 --> 00:37:24,828 - No, my heels aren't too high. 909 00:37:24,869 --> 00:37:27,330 It's because I spent three hours in a car trunk. 910 00:37:27,414 --> 00:37:28,665 Thanks for not locking the door 911 00:37:28,748 --> 00:37:30,208 when I asked you to, Phyllis. 912 00:37:30,291 --> 00:37:33,003 - Ohh. - [sighs] 913 00:37:33,128 --> 00:37:36,006 Sorry, Phyllis. You didn't know. 914 00:37:36,089 --> 00:37:38,216 As long as I can get to the altar. 915 00:37:38,341 --> 00:37:40,385 - Oh, I'm gonna get you to that altar. 916 00:37:40,427 --> 00:37:42,137 You can take that to the bank. 917 00:37:44,305 --> 00:37:47,308 - You ready? - [chuckles] You kidding? 918 00:37:47,475 --> 00:37:48,810 I was born ready. 919 00:37:48,935 --> 00:37:50,395 [mimicking heavy metal music] 920 00:37:50,437 --> 00:37:51,521 - Dwight, Dwight, Dwight. 921 00:37:51,604 --> 00:37:53,982 Um... 922 00:37:54,065 --> 00:37:56,026 I don't know how to tell you this, but... 923 00:37:56,109 --> 00:37:57,652 we have a little bit of a problem. 924 00:37:57,819 --> 00:38:00,113 - Oh, no. What? 925 00:38:00,238 --> 00:38:02,741 - The minister just told me that it's tradition 926 00:38:02,824 --> 00:38:06,036 for the bestisch mensch to be older than the groom. 927 00:38:06,119 --> 00:38:07,579 - Oh, come on. 928 00:38:07,662 --> 00:38:09,122 I've never heard of such a thing. 929 00:38:09,164 --> 00:38:10,498 - I haven't heard of it, obviously. 930 00:38:10,582 --> 00:38:11,916 But I'm out, 931 00:38:12,042 --> 00:38:13,668 because I'm significantly younger than you. 932 00:38:13,752 --> 00:38:15,837 - Not--significant is a big word. 933 00:38:15,879 --> 00:38:17,213 - I think it's definitely-- well, okay. 934 00:38:17,297 --> 00:38:18,506 Either way-- - I think you're only a teeny-- 935 00:38:18,631 --> 00:38:21,343 - Either way, Dwight... 936 00:38:21,468 --> 00:38:24,012 I can't be there for you. 937 00:38:24,054 --> 00:38:26,348 I'm sorry. 938 00:38:26,389 --> 00:38:27,932 - Jim. 939 00:38:28,058 --> 00:38:32,103 - I just... really wish there was something I could do. 940 00:38:40,487 --> 00:38:41,821 - [whispering] Michael. 941 00:38:44,157 --> 00:38:46,451 I can't believe you came. 942 00:38:46,493 --> 00:38:48,370 - That's what she said. 943 00:38:48,453 --> 00:38:53,333 - [laughing] 944 00:38:53,416 --> 00:38:55,418 - Best prank ever. 945 00:38:55,502 --> 00:38:57,128 - Yeah! 946 00:38:57,212 --> 00:38:59,923 [instrumental version of "Sweet Child O' Mine" playing] 947 00:39:00,006 --> 00:39:06,888 ? ? 948 00:39:23,363 --> 00:39:25,490 - As is traditional to the Schrutes, 949 00:39:25,573 --> 00:39:28,535 the lovers are standing in their own graves 950 00:39:28,702 --> 00:39:33,373 as a reminder that this is the only escape 951 00:39:33,415 --> 00:39:35,667 from what they are about to do. 952 00:39:35,792 --> 00:39:37,252 - See, I get what they're trying to do, 953 00:39:37,377 --> 00:39:39,254 but why are the graves so shallow? 954 00:39:39,337 --> 00:39:40,839 Ugh. 955 00:39:47,804 --> 00:39:52,600 - "Arise, my love, my fair one, and come away. 956 00:39:52,726 --> 00:39:56,229 "For lo, the winter is passed. 957 00:39:56,312 --> 00:39:59,190 "The rain is over and gone. 958 00:39:59,232 --> 00:40:03,111 "The time of singing has come, 959 00:40:03,194 --> 00:40:05,780 "and the voice of the turtle dove 960 00:40:05,864 --> 00:40:08,116 "is heard in our land. 961 00:40:08,158 --> 00:40:12,537 "Let me see your face. Let me hear your voice. 962 00:40:12,620 --> 00:40:14,956 "For your voice is sweet, 963 00:40:15,081 --> 00:40:19,169 and your face is comely." 964 00:40:19,294 --> 00:40:22,547 - I now pronounce you man and wife. 965 00:40:22,589 --> 00:40:27,177 [cheers and applause] 966 00:40:27,218 --> 00:40:29,554 - Bravo! - Bravo! 967 00:40:29,637 --> 00:40:31,014 - Whoo! 968 00:40:31,056 --> 00:40:34,017 - Release the doves! 969 00:40:34,142 --> 00:40:36,644 all: Ooh! 970 00:40:38,355 --> 00:40:39,439 - Oh. 971 00:40:39,606 --> 00:40:40,774 That's-- 972 00:40:40,940 --> 00:40:42,108 - Go. 973 00:40:42,233 --> 00:40:43,068 - That's not-- 974 00:40:43,151 --> 00:40:44,944 - [gasps] 975 00:40:45,028 --> 00:40:47,364 - Ladies and gentlemen, thank you so much for coming. 976 00:40:47,447 --> 00:40:50,492 Now, please take your hay bales to the reception. 977 00:40:50,575 --> 00:40:52,077 They'll be used for seating. 978 00:40:52,160 --> 00:40:54,746 Complimentary hay hooks are placed along the aisles. 979 00:40:54,788 --> 00:40:56,664 Just stab 'em on in there. 980 00:40:58,917 --> 00:41:00,168 - [straining] 981 00:41:00,251 --> 00:41:02,087 [indistinct chatter] 982 00:41:02,170 --> 00:41:03,171 - Agh! - You get it? 983 00:41:07,467 --> 00:41:10,637 - ? Now when the winds cry Angela ? 984 00:41:10,720 --> 00:41:13,807 ? Angela, I'll be there for ya ? 985 00:41:13,890 --> 00:41:17,936 ? And when the storms scream Angela ? 986 00:41:18,019 --> 00:41:23,066 ? Angela, I'll be there, yeah ? 987 00:41:23,191 --> 00:41:24,693 ? Oh, Angela ? 988 00:41:24,818 --> 00:41:26,277 ? ? 989 00:41:26,361 --> 00:41:29,114 ? Oh, Angela ? 990 00:41:29,239 --> 00:41:33,118 ? When the winds cry Angela ? 991 00:41:33,159 --> 00:41:34,202 ? Angela ? 992 00:41:34,244 --> 00:41:36,246 - Everybody. 993 00:41:36,371 --> 00:41:41,960 - ? Shout it, hey, here comes my girl ? 994 00:41:42,002 --> 00:41:45,839 ? Here comes my girl ? 995 00:41:45,964 --> 00:41:48,633 - See, now you don't owe me anything. 996 00:41:48,758 --> 00:41:52,470 - ? Yeah, she looks so right ? 997 00:41:52,554 --> 00:41:58,351 ? She is all I need tonight ? 998 00:41:58,435 --> 00:42:00,103 - Jim. 999 00:42:00,228 --> 00:42:03,189 ? ? 1000 00:42:03,231 --> 00:42:04,524 - Hi. - Hey. 1001 00:42:04,607 --> 00:42:06,401 [laughter] 1002 00:42:06,526 --> 00:42:08,236 ? ? 1003 00:42:08,278 --> 00:42:11,281 - ? Sara smile ? 1004 00:42:11,406 --> 00:42:13,408 - Michael has so many pictures of his kids, 1005 00:42:13,533 --> 00:42:15,493 he had to get two phones with two numbers, 1006 00:42:15,577 --> 00:42:16,870 and he pays two bills. 1007 00:42:16,995 --> 00:42:18,455 Oh, my gosh, it's choreographed! 1008 00:42:18,538 --> 00:42:21,708 He's just so happy to have a family plan. 1009 00:42:21,791 --> 00:42:24,794 [The Cars' "You Might Think playing] 1010 00:42:24,878 --> 00:42:27,756 ? ? 1011 00:42:27,839 --> 00:42:29,507 - Where'd you learn to dance like that? 1012 00:42:29,591 --> 00:42:30,884 - I don't know. 1013 00:42:30,967 --> 00:42:32,594 I've just always been really good at dancing. 1014 00:42:32,719 --> 00:42:34,763 ? ? 1015 00:42:34,846 --> 00:42:36,681 - [sobbing] 1016 00:42:36,806 --> 00:42:40,935 - ? I'll meet you in the middle of a hurricane ? 1017 00:42:41,019 --> 00:42:43,646 - Is it me? 1018 00:42:43,730 --> 00:42:45,565 Is it Nellie? 1019 00:42:45,648 --> 00:42:48,151 - [sobbing] It's everything. 1020 00:42:48,276 --> 00:42:53,740 - ? I'll meet you in the middle of a sad song ? 1021 00:42:53,823 --> 00:42:55,033 - ? So free and easy ? 1022 00:42:55,116 --> 00:42:56,618 - I missed you. 1023 00:42:56,701 --> 00:42:58,620 - I missed you too. 1024 00:42:58,661 --> 00:43:00,663 - ? I'm excited just by touching your hand ? 1025 00:43:00,747 --> 00:43:02,540 - Lots of people think that 1026 00:43:02,624 --> 00:43:04,084 Stanley Hudson's a mean old grump. 1027 00:43:04,167 --> 00:43:05,460 [laughs] 1028 00:43:05,543 --> 00:43:07,003 But...[crying] 1029 00:43:07,087 --> 00:43:10,799 Would a grump make this? 1030 00:43:10,882 --> 00:43:15,637 It's me. It's me. 1031 00:43:16,930 --> 00:43:18,264 - Ravi? 1032 00:43:18,348 --> 00:43:20,016 Ravi? 1033 00:43:20,100 --> 00:43:21,601 Drake has a bit of a rash. 1034 00:43:21,685 --> 00:43:23,228 And he's hot. - Oh, no. 1035 00:43:23,353 --> 00:43:24,646 - I was wondering, 1036 00:43:24,771 --> 00:43:26,189 could you maybe examine him for a second? 1037 00:43:26,314 --> 00:43:28,441 - Oh, yeah, you're not feeling well, little guy? 1038 00:43:28,566 --> 00:43:30,110 Okay, sure. Should we go inside? 1039 00:43:30,151 --> 00:43:31,569 - Actually, could you go inside? 1040 00:43:31,653 --> 00:43:33,321 I'm feeling a little dehydrated. 1041 00:43:33,405 --> 00:43:35,824 I could really use a little break, have some water. 1042 00:43:35,949 --> 00:43:37,158 - Are you sure you don't wanna go in? 1043 00:43:37,283 --> 00:43:39,285 - Ravi, just do it. That baby is burning up. 1044 00:43:39,411 --> 00:43:40,745 Isn't this, like, what you live for? 1045 00:43:40,829 --> 00:43:42,580 Just go, go! - Thank you, Ravi. 1046 00:43:42,706 --> 00:43:43,957 Thank you so much. 1047 00:43:44,082 --> 00:43:45,291 This is great for me and for Drake. 1048 00:43:45,333 --> 00:43:46,501 Thank you. 1049 00:43:48,336 --> 00:43:50,255 [sighs] 1050 00:43:50,338 --> 00:43:53,466 - I don't know, Ryan. Baby Drake didn't look so good. 1051 00:43:53,550 --> 00:43:55,343 - He'll be fine. I let him suck on a strawberry. 1052 00:43:55,385 --> 00:43:56,720 He's allergic, but he'll get over it fast. 1053 00:43:56,803 --> 00:43:58,638 I had to talk to you. 1054 00:43:58,722 --> 00:44:00,515 - You gave your baby an allergic reaction 1055 00:44:00,598 --> 00:44:03,351 just to talk to me? 1056 00:44:06,354 --> 00:44:08,356 - Mm. Mmm. 1057 00:44:09,524 --> 00:44:12,193 [clinking] 1058 00:44:12,277 --> 00:44:13,737 - Angela... 1059 00:44:13,778 --> 00:44:16,656 [speaking in indistinct language] 1060 00:44:22,412 --> 00:44:24,039 [laughter] 1061 00:44:24,164 --> 00:44:25,623 - Hey. 1062 00:44:25,707 --> 00:44:28,001 I didn't know Angela was from Canada. 1063 00:44:28,126 --> 00:44:30,879 - [speaking in indistinct language] 1064 00:44:37,802 --> 00:44:40,055 - [sniffling] 1065 00:44:40,138 --> 00:44:41,473 - It's okay. 1066 00:44:45,060 --> 00:44:47,395 - Cheers. Cheers. 1067 00:44:49,230 --> 00:44:51,232 [clinking] 1068 00:44:51,358 --> 00:44:52,942 - Hi. 1069 00:44:53,026 --> 00:44:56,738 I knew about Dwight and Angela before anybody else, 1070 00:44:56,821 --> 00:44:59,991 because I walked in on them having sex. 1071 00:45:00,116 --> 00:45:03,912 They acted all mad, but I think they really liked it. 1072 00:45:03,953 --> 00:45:06,539 [laughs] If I'm being honest, I guess I liked it too. 1073 00:45:06,623 --> 00:45:08,750 [laughter] 1074 00:45:08,875 --> 00:45:11,961 It was a nice moment the three of us shared. 1075 00:45:12,045 --> 00:45:15,048 You know, Dwight doesn't have any hair on his back at all. 1076 00:45:15,131 --> 00:45:16,883 [chuckles] 1077 00:45:17,008 --> 00:45:18,093 This isn't apple juice, huh? 1078 00:45:18,218 --> 00:45:19,344 - No. 1079 00:45:19,427 --> 00:45:20,637 - Okay, cheers. 1080 00:45:20,762 --> 00:45:21,846 Cheers. 1081 00:45:27,811 --> 00:45:30,146 [clinking] 1082 00:45:30,271 --> 00:45:31,731 - Oh, boy. 1083 00:45:31,856 --> 00:45:33,358 It's that crying jerk from the internet. 1084 00:45:33,441 --> 00:45:34,859 This is gonna be a train wreck. 1085 00:45:34,901 --> 00:45:36,403 - Hey, everyone. 1086 00:45:36,486 --> 00:45:39,280 My name's Andy Bernard, and I'd like to make a toast. 1087 00:45:39,322 --> 00:45:40,990 Pretty sure whatever comes out of my mouth 1088 00:45:41,032 --> 00:45:43,410 will not be the most embarrassing moment of my life. 1089 00:45:43,493 --> 00:45:45,161 [laughter] 1090 00:45:45,245 --> 00:45:46,788 I'm gonna give a short speech, 1091 00:45:46,830 --> 00:45:48,248 and I'll do my best to keep it in English. 1092 00:45:48,331 --> 00:45:51,126 [laughter] 1093 00:45:51,251 --> 00:45:54,254 - You can do it, Andy! - Thank you, Phyllis. 1094 00:45:54,337 --> 00:45:57,424 I've known the bride and groom for many years, 1095 00:45:57,507 --> 00:45:59,426 and there was even a brief moment where 1096 00:45:59,509 --> 00:46:02,095 Angela and I were kind of a thing. 1097 00:46:02,178 --> 00:46:05,015 But as I look at you today, 1098 00:46:05,098 --> 00:46:08,143 what is so obvious is 1099 00:46:08,184 --> 00:46:10,645 that there was never anyone else in the world 1100 00:46:10,770 --> 00:46:15,191 for Angela Martin other than Dwight Schrute. 1101 00:46:15,275 --> 00:46:18,194 And so I have a little advice for the groom. 1102 00:46:18,319 --> 00:46:20,363 Be Dwight Schrute. 1103 00:46:20,447 --> 00:46:22,866 She loves you. 1104 00:46:22,949 --> 00:46:24,200 To Dwight and Angela. 1105 00:46:24,325 --> 00:46:25,535 all: Aw. - Hear, hear! 1106 00:46:25,618 --> 00:46:28,204 [cheers and applause] 1107 00:46:28,288 --> 00:46:30,415 - Ugh. Well, that was lovely. 1108 00:46:30,498 --> 00:46:31,791 Delete. 1109 00:46:33,835 --> 00:46:37,339 - ? I wanna run with you, fast as I can ? 1110 00:46:37,464 --> 00:46:38,923 - I love you. - [laughing] I love you too. 1111 00:46:39,007 --> 00:46:40,175 - We're gonna be together forever. 1112 00:46:40,300 --> 00:46:41,801 - We're running off into the sunset. 1113 00:46:41,843 --> 00:46:43,678 - I finally mastered commitment. 1114 00:46:48,308 --> 00:46:49,851 - ? Rosalita, jump a little higher ? 1115 00:46:50,018 --> 00:46:52,729 ? Senorita, come sit by my fire ? 1116 00:46:52,896 --> 00:46:55,857 ? I just wanna be your lover, ain't no liar ? 1117 00:46:55,899 --> 00:46:58,568 ? Rosalita, you're my stone desire ? 1118 00:46:58,610 --> 00:47:00,779 ? Oh, yeah ? 1119 00:47:00,862 --> 00:47:04,783 ? ? 1120 00:47:04,824 --> 00:47:06,201 - What was that stuff? 1121 00:47:06,368 --> 00:47:08,203 - Hey, has anyone seen Ryan... or Kelly? 1122 00:47:08,286 --> 00:47:10,038 - Ooh! Yes. 1123 00:47:10,163 --> 00:47:12,874 Uh, they left together a little while ago. 1124 00:47:12,916 --> 00:47:15,794 Kelly was hoping that you would keep the baby 1125 00:47:15,877 --> 00:47:18,296 so they can start a new life together. 1126 00:47:18,463 --> 00:47:21,424 - Oh, that's it. Here. 1127 00:47:21,508 --> 00:47:24,219 Call child services and report an abandoned baby. 1128 00:47:24,302 --> 00:47:26,221 They'll find a better parent than Ryan in no time. 1129 00:47:26,304 --> 00:47:28,598 - Oh, I don't know. 1130 00:47:28,765 --> 00:47:30,642 - Um, Kevin? 1131 00:47:30,725 --> 00:47:33,728 Oh, I can help you with that. Yeah. 1132 00:47:33,895 --> 00:47:35,897 I mean, I can find someone who will-- 1133 00:47:36,064 --> 00:47:37,732 who will love that... [baby cooing] 1134 00:47:37,774 --> 00:47:39,818 Beautiful little boy the way he deserves. 1135 00:47:39,984 --> 00:47:42,987 - Hey. This is better. 1136 00:47:43,071 --> 00:47:45,657 - Yes! It is. - Hi. 1137 00:47:45,824 --> 00:47:47,409 - Oh, yes. - Hey. 1138 00:47:47,534 --> 00:47:49,494 - Yes, it is. 1139 00:47:49,577 --> 00:47:51,538 Oh, yes, it is! 1140 00:47:51,663 --> 00:47:53,039 If Ryan wants his baby back, 1141 00:47:53,081 --> 00:47:55,208 please tell him where to find me. 1142 00:47:55,333 --> 00:47:57,252 We'll be somewhere in Europe. 1143 00:47:57,293 --> 00:47:59,170 [laughing] 1144 00:47:59,212 --> 00:48:01,339 Won't we? [Drake laughing] 1145 00:48:01,464 --> 00:48:04,342 [indistinct chatter] 1146 00:48:07,804 --> 00:48:10,056 - [crying] I feel like all my kids grew up, 1147 00:48:10,223 --> 00:48:12,100 and then they married each other. 1148 00:48:14,144 --> 00:48:17,063 It's every parent's dream. 1149 00:48:17,230 --> 00:48:18,565 - Thank you so much. - Good night. 1150 00:48:18,648 --> 00:48:19,649 - Good luck. - Great. It was really fun. 1151 00:48:19,774 --> 00:48:20,692 - Good evening. 1152 00:48:20,775 --> 00:48:21,776 - The doc crew's throwing a big 1153 00:48:21,943 --> 00:48:23,611 after party in the warehouse tonight. 1154 00:48:23,737 --> 00:48:25,780 - Yeah, I heard. It sounds kinda lame. 1155 00:48:25,864 --> 00:48:28,450 No offense. You going, Toby? 1156 00:48:28,491 --> 00:48:30,702 - Oh, I don't know. I might turn in early. 1157 00:48:30,785 --> 00:48:32,662 - It's only 6:00. 1158 00:48:32,704 --> 00:48:34,581 Come on, everybody's going. - You have to go, Toby. 1159 00:48:34,664 --> 00:48:36,082 - Yeah, come on, Tobes. - Come on, Toby. 1160 00:48:36,207 --> 00:48:37,917 - Come on! - Yeah, I'll stop by. 1161 00:48:38,084 --> 00:48:40,253 [all cheering] - There he is. 1162 00:48:49,429 --> 00:48:53,433 - [sighs] I need to get out of this dress. 1163 00:48:53,475 --> 00:48:54,768 - I gotta get out of this dress. 1164 00:48:56,436 --> 00:48:58,772 - Oh, I'm sorry, Pam. 1165 00:48:58,855 --> 00:48:59,731 - What's going on? 1166 00:48:59,814 --> 00:49:01,483 - [sighs] 1167 00:49:01,649 --> 00:49:02,984 [whispering] Why are you still here? 1168 00:49:03,068 --> 00:49:05,111 - I'm so sorry. They were an hour late. 1169 00:49:05,278 --> 00:49:06,738 - No, really, what's going on? 1170 00:49:06,905 --> 00:49:09,199 - Okay, okay. Um... 1171 00:49:09,282 --> 00:49:10,825 so... 1172 00:49:10,992 --> 00:49:13,745 this past year has been really great, 1173 00:49:13,787 --> 00:49:17,332 and you've been great, and... 1174 00:49:17,415 --> 00:49:19,626 I just--I know that you had to make this choice, 1175 00:49:19,751 --> 00:49:21,378 and you had to give something up for me. 1176 00:49:21,544 --> 00:49:24,297 But I never want you to have to give up anything. 1177 00:49:24,381 --> 00:49:26,883 I just thought if I could get us an offer, 1178 00:49:26,925 --> 00:49:28,885 then there wouldn't be anything standing in our way, 1179 00:49:29,010 --> 00:49:33,181 and I could come to you with this big Jim gesture... 1180 00:49:33,223 --> 00:49:36,851 and show you all at once just how much I love you, 1181 00:49:36,893 --> 00:49:40,355 and how much I really do believe in your future. 1182 00:49:40,438 --> 00:49:42,524 - Sorry, how long have you been showing the house? 1183 00:49:42,607 --> 00:49:44,943 - About two months. - That's why it's so clean. 1184 00:49:45,026 --> 00:49:46,569 - Yeah. 1185 00:49:46,653 --> 00:49:49,531 - I mean, you were gonna do this without me? 1186 00:49:49,572 --> 00:49:52,200 - Well, you--you bought the house without telling me, 1187 00:49:52,283 --> 00:49:55,620 so I thought I could sell it without telling you. 1188 00:49:55,745 --> 00:49:58,581 - Oh... okay. - [laughs] 1189 00:49:58,623 --> 00:50:00,875 - Where would we go? 1190 00:50:01,001 --> 00:50:04,004 - Austin? Maybe. 1191 00:50:04,087 --> 00:50:06,006 - I promise you... 1192 00:50:06,047 --> 00:50:07,590 you don't have to do this for me. 1193 00:50:07,674 --> 00:50:10,635 - I'm doing it for us. 1194 00:50:10,719 --> 00:50:11,720 - Okay. - The last-- 1195 00:50:11,886 --> 00:50:13,555 - We'll take it. - Hold on one second. 1196 00:50:13,638 --> 00:50:15,890 The last few months have meant the world to me. 1197 00:50:16,016 --> 00:50:17,392 And all I care about-- - Hold on a second. 1198 00:50:17,475 --> 00:50:18,810 Wait, what did you just say? 1199 00:50:18,935 --> 00:50:21,563 - We wanna buy your house. 1200 00:50:21,604 --> 00:50:23,690 - [laughs] 1201 00:50:25,608 --> 00:50:28,111 - You wanna do this? - I wanna do this. 1202 00:50:28,236 --> 00:50:30,780 - You really wanna do this? - I really wanna do this! 1203 00:50:30,822 --> 00:50:34,075 [both laughing] 1204 00:50:34,200 --> 00:50:35,994 - Oh, my God. 1205 00:50:36,077 --> 00:50:38,830 [indistinct rap music playing] 1206 00:50:38,913 --> 00:50:41,750 ? ? 1207 00:50:41,833 --> 00:50:44,711 [indistinct chatter] 1208 00:50:48,757 --> 00:50:50,842 - Cheese! 1209 00:50:50,884 --> 00:50:52,177 Thanks, guys. See ya. 1210 00:50:52,260 --> 00:50:54,429 - [speaking indistinctly] 1211 00:50:54,512 --> 00:50:56,765 - Okay, yeah. Great. 1212 00:50:56,931 --> 00:50:58,767 ? ? 1213 00:50:58,808 --> 00:51:00,894 Thank you. 1214 00:51:03,063 --> 00:51:04,814 - Hey, Darryl. 1215 00:51:04,939 --> 00:51:07,192 [whispers indistinctly] 1216 00:51:07,275 --> 00:51:09,444 - What? 1217 00:51:10,612 --> 00:51:11,821 - Yeah. 1218 00:51:11,863 --> 00:51:13,031 - All right! 1219 00:51:13,156 --> 00:51:15,700 - We're so excited. 1220 00:51:15,784 --> 00:51:17,327 - Cool. 1221 00:51:17,410 --> 00:51:19,329 - Oh, that's for PBS executives only. 1222 00:51:19,496 --> 00:51:21,831 - I had to pledge $50 to my local PBS station 1223 00:51:21,956 --> 00:51:23,458 just to get this. 1224 00:51:25,585 --> 00:51:27,462 - I think your ideas are fantastic, Oscar. 1225 00:51:27,629 --> 00:51:28,880 I'd love to contribute to your campaign. 1226 00:51:29,005 --> 00:51:31,549 - Thank you, David. 1227 00:51:31,716 --> 00:51:34,594 [indistinct chatter] 1228 00:51:41,685 --> 00:51:44,229 - Hey, Clark. You seem better than this show. 1229 00:51:44,270 --> 00:51:46,481 - The American Workplace series is doing a couple of new docs 1230 00:51:46,564 --> 00:51:48,108 this year, one on an oil rig 1231 00:51:48,149 --> 00:51:49,818 and another in a modeling agency. 1232 00:51:49,984 --> 00:51:52,195 - Any interest in being a unit producer? 1233 00:51:52,362 --> 00:51:54,531 - No, I--I think I'm in the right place for now. 1234 00:51:54,656 --> 00:51:55,490 Thanks, though. 1235 00:51:55,657 --> 00:51:59,953 ? ? 1236 00:52:00,078 --> 00:52:01,246 - I have a great place in Austin. 1237 00:52:01,287 --> 00:52:02,163 You should come visit. 1238 00:52:02,247 --> 00:52:03,373 I could totally put you up. 1239 00:52:03,415 --> 00:52:04,749 - I'd like that. 1240 00:52:04,833 --> 00:52:08,503 ? ? 1241 00:52:08,545 --> 00:52:10,839 - Uh, could I please have your attention? 1242 00:52:12,507 --> 00:52:15,885 So a year ago, I got my first art commission 1243 00:52:15,969 --> 00:52:18,138 to paint a mural for Dunder Mifflin. 1244 00:52:18,179 --> 00:52:21,933 And I decided to paint the history of paper, 1245 00:52:21,975 --> 00:52:23,852 which was just some trees and stuff. 1246 00:52:23,893 --> 00:52:26,688 And then someone spray-painted a bunch of butts on it, 1247 00:52:26,855 --> 00:52:28,940 and I had to start from the beginning. 1248 00:52:29,024 --> 00:52:31,735 But it all worked out for the best, 1249 00:52:31,776 --> 00:52:35,030 because I think that I've painted the perfect thing, 1250 00:52:35,113 --> 00:52:37,323 which is the history of us. 1251 00:52:37,407 --> 00:52:39,617 All of us. 1252 00:52:39,701 --> 00:52:41,453 And this is for you, Jim. 1253 00:52:41,619 --> 00:52:44,289 [applause] And go ahead! 1254 00:52:46,291 --> 00:52:49,169 [cheers and applause] 1255 00:52:52,630 --> 00:52:54,883 Everyone, let's take our picture in front of the mural. 1256 00:53:04,476 --> 00:53:05,852 Oh, um, I just-- 1257 00:53:05,935 --> 00:53:07,854 I kind of meant just everybody from the office. 1258 00:53:07,937 --> 00:53:10,690 [laughter] 1259 00:53:10,774 --> 00:53:14,778 [shutter clicking] 1260 00:53:14,819 --> 00:53:15,820 - Very nice. 1261 00:53:15,862 --> 00:53:17,405 Just a couple dozen more. 1262 00:53:18,865 --> 00:53:20,992 Smiles, everybody, smiles. 1263 00:53:23,870 --> 00:53:24,954 All right, that's great. I got enough. 1264 00:53:25,038 --> 00:53:26,164 Thank you, everybody. 1265 00:53:31,586 --> 00:53:33,171 - Let's go outside. - Okay. 1266 00:53:33,296 --> 00:53:35,715 [indistinct chatter] 1267 00:53:40,220 --> 00:53:42,097 - Okay, I need a drink. 1268 00:53:42,180 --> 00:53:44,557 - Yeah, we all need a drink. 1269 00:53:44,641 --> 00:53:46,559 What the-- 1270 00:53:46,643 --> 00:53:49,813 there's only dandelion tea and raisins in here. 1271 00:53:49,896 --> 00:53:51,856 - Hey... bottom drawer. 1272 00:53:53,566 --> 00:53:55,860 - Yes! 1273 00:53:55,944 --> 00:53:58,697 [phone ringing] 1274 00:53:58,780 --> 00:53:59,906 - Oh, so... - Mm-hmm. 1275 00:53:59,989 --> 00:54:01,032 - Right. 1276 00:54:07,622 --> 00:54:10,125 - Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam. 1277 00:54:10,208 --> 00:54:12,252 Oh, I'm sorry. 1278 00:54:12,335 --> 00:54:14,754 Jim Halpert doesn't work here anymore. 1279 00:54:18,717 --> 00:54:20,677 I didn't watch the whole documentary. 1280 00:54:20,802 --> 00:54:23,054 After a few episodes, it was too painful. 1281 00:54:23,179 --> 00:54:26,099 I kept wanting to scream at Pam. 1282 00:54:26,141 --> 00:54:29,269 It took me so long to do so many important things. 1283 00:54:29,352 --> 00:54:32,230 It's just hard to accept that I spent so many years 1284 00:54:32,272 --> 00:54:35,191 being less happy than I could've been. 1285 00:54:35,233 --> 00:54:37,360 Jim was 5 feet from my desk, 1286 00:54:37,485 --> 00:54:40,488 and it took me four years to get to him. 1287 00:54:40,530 --> 00:54:42,741 It'd be great if people saw this documentary 1288 00:54:42,824 --> 00:54:44,743 and learned from my mistakes. 1289 00:54:44,826 --> 00:54:46,202 Not that I'm a tragic person. 1290 00:54:46,286 --> 00:54:48,121 I'm really happy now. 1291 00:54:48,163 --> 00:54:49,956 But... 1292 00:54:50,081 --> 00:54:53,543 it would just-- just make my heart soar 1293 00:54:53,626 --> 00:54:55,378 if someone out there saw this 1294 00:54:55,462 --> 00:54:57,839 and she said to herself, 1295 00:54:57,922 --> 00:54:59,299 "Be strong. 1296 00:54:59,424 --> 00:55:01,718 "Trust yourself, love yourself. 1297 00:55:01,801 --> 00:55:03,595 "Conquer your fears. 1298 00:55:03,678 --> 00:55:05,972 "Just go after what you want. 1299 00:55:06,056 --> 00:55:10,560 And act fast, because life just isn't that long." 1300 00:55:10,643 --> 00:55:13,355 - If there is one thing that I have learned 1301 00:55:13,438 --> 00:55:15,648 through this whole experience... 1302 00:55:15,732 --> 00:55:17,525 [cheering] It's that... 1303 00:55:17,650 --> 00:55:21,613 if you film anybody long enough, 1304 00:55:21,654 --> 00:55:25,033 they're going to do something stupid. 1305 00:55:25,116 --> 00:55:26,076 [all whooping] 1306 00:55:26,159 --> 00:55:29,496 It's only human natural. 1307 00:55:29,579 --> 00:55:30,872 - [laughs] 1308 00:55:30,997 --> 00:55:33,208 Remember when Ed Truck got his head cut off? 1309 00:55:33,291 --> 00:55:34,250 - Oh! - Phyllis! 1310 00:55:34,334 --> 00:55:35,710 That's so depressing. 1311 00:55:35,835 --> 00:55:38,046 Why would you... - Well, it happened. 1312 00:55:38,171 --> 00:55:41,007 - Hey, remember when, um-- when I won the fun run? 1313 00:55:41,091 --> 00:55:42,801 - Did you? 1314 00:55:42,926 --> 00:55:43,968 - Yeah. - Yeah, yeah. 1315 00:55:44,052 --> 00:55:45,595 - Huh. - No, that wasn't you. 1316 00:55:45,720 --> 00:55:47,305 - Who won? 1317 00:55:47,430 --> 00:55:48,556 - How 'bout Florida? 1318 00:55:48,640 --> 00:55:49,599 I loved Florida. 1319 00:55:49,683 --> 00:55:51,559 - I lost my job over Florida. 1320 00:55:51,643 --> 00:55:52,852 The first time. 1321 00:55:52,936 --> 00:55:54,562 - It was worth it. 1322 00:55:54,646 --> 00:55:55,772 - Absolutely. 1323 00:55:55,855 --> 00:55:57,107 - Do you guys remember 1324 00:55:57,232 --> 00:55:59,234 when Obama got elected? 1325 00:55:59,275 --> 00:56:00,360 - Sure. - Yes. 1326 00:56:00,485 --> 00:56:01,861 - Of course. - The first or second time? 1327 00:56:01,945 --> 00:56:03,863 - Huh? 1328 00:56:03,947 --> 00:56:06,366 - I learned something watching the documentary. 1329 00:56:06,449 --> 00:56:08,326 Just trying to make an honest living, 1330 00:56:08,368 --> 00:56:11,830 doing your best, trying to find love 1331 00:56:11,913 --> 00:56:13,915 and maybe something to smile about, 1332 00:56:13,998 --> 00:56:17,043 that's heroic, you know? 1333 00:56:17,085 --> 00:56:20,338 That's why, in my latest Chad Flenderman novel, 1334 00:56:20,463 --> 00:56:25,176 Chad's just a day-to-day office worker like the rest of us... 1335 00:56:25,301 --> 00:56:28,596 until a mysterious letter arrives. 1336 00:56:28,722 --> 00:56:31,516 "Dear Chad, you may not remember me." 1337 00:56:31,641 --> 00:56:33,309 And it's true-- you can't expect 1338 00:56:33,393 --> 00:56:36,146 a man like Chad to remember all his lovers. 1339 00:56:36,229 --> 00:56:37,313 - Hey, guys. - Hi. 1340 00:56:37,397 --> 00:56:40,692 all: Hey! 1341 00:56:40,817 --> 00:56:42,444 - What about the honeymoon? 1342 00:56:42,485 --> 00:56:44,029 - Oh, the honeymoon can wait till tomorrow. 1343 00:56:44,112 --> 00:56:45,613 We wanted to hang out with you guys. 1344 00:56:45,697 --> 00:56:48,825 I mean, when are we all going to be here together again? 1345 00:56:48,908 --> 00:56:50,577 - Aw. 1346 00:56:50,702 --> 00:56:52,662 J, P, and D. The three amigos. 1347 00:56:52,704 --> 00:56:53,830 Ah, it warms my heart. 1348 00:56:53,872 --> 00:56:54,873 Hey, what do you say, 1349 00:56:54,956 --> 00:56:56,499 when I get back from our honeymoon, 1350 00:56:56,624 --> 00:56:57,834 the three of us have a conference room meeting 1351 00:56:57,917 --> 00:57:00,337 just for fun? 1352 00:57:00,420 --> 00:57:03,381 What is that meaningful look? 1353 00:57:03,423 --> 00:57:05,967 - You know what? Maybe we should talk. 1354 00:57:06,092 --> 00:57:08,303 - Hey, come here. You guys need to see this. 1355 00:57:08,386 --> 00:57:09,804 - What is it? 1356 00:57:09,929 --> 00:57:11,222 - You're probably sitting there wondering 1357 00:57:11,306 --> 00:57:13,016 what will be your mark, 1358 00:57:13,099 --> 00:57:15,894 what will you be known for? 1359 00:57:15,977 --> 00:57:17,729 It might surprise you to learn... 1360 00:57:17,812 --> 00:57:19,898 - I finally feel ready. 1361 00:57:20,023 --> 00:57:21,649 Athlead is growing. - Athleap. 1362 00:57:21,733 --> 00:57:24,027 - And Jim can jump back in without skipping a beat. 1363 00:57:24,152 --> 00:57:25,695 We'll come back to visit. 1364 00:57:25,779 --> 00:57:28,156 But I think it's time for us to officially-- 1365 00:57:28,281 --> 00:57:29,532 - No, don't say it. You're fired! 1366 00:57:29,616 --> 00:57:30,617 - Okay. - You're both fired! 1367 00:57:30,742 --> 00:57:32,660 - Dwight, come on. Don't end on a bad note. 1368 00:57:32,786 --> 00:57:34,537 - Don't be an idiot. It's for the severance. 1369 00:57:34,621 --> 00:57:35,955 The best that I can do is 1370 00:57:36,039 --> 00:57:37,374 one month for every year you've been here. 1371 00:57:37,499 --> 00:57:38,667 That's the max. 1372 00:57:40,669 --> 00:57:42,754 - Thanks, Dwight. 1373 00:57:42,796 --> 00:57:44,923 - Hey, and if you're ever in Austin-- 1374 00:57:45,006 --> 00:57:46,883 - Oh, right. For what, the art? 1375 00:57:46,966 --> 00:57:49,177 The music? The incredible nightlife? 1376 00:57:49,260 --> 00:57:50,428 No, thank you. 1377 00:57:50,512 --> 00:57:51,805 But if you're ever in the area, 1378 00:57:51,930 --> 00:57:53,848 you'll always have a place to stay. 1379 00:57:53,932 --> 00:57:55,392 In my barn. 1380 00:57:55,475 --> 00:57:57,519 - There it is. 1381 00:57:57,602 --> 00:57:59,854 - Do I get along with my co-workers? 1382 00:57:59,979 --> 00:58:02,524 Well, first of all, I don't have co-workers anymore. 1383 00:58:02,565 --> 00:58:03,983 I have subordinates. 1384 00:58:04,067 --> 00:58:05,527 So... 1385 00:58:05,652 --> 00:58:07,487 have I gotten along with my subordinates? 1386 00:58:07,570 --> 00:58:09,364 Let's see. 1387 00:58:09,447 --> 00:58:12,075 My supplier relations rep, Meredith Palmer, 1388 00:58:12,117 --> 00:58:13,952 is the only person I know who knows how to properly 1389 00:58:14,077 --> 00:58:15,412 head bang to Motorhead . 1390 00:58:15,495 --> 00:58:17,247 [rock music playing] 1391 00:58:17,330 --> 00:58:21,167 Oscar Martinez, my accountant, is now godfather to my son. 1392 00:58:21,251 --> 00:58:22,919 Angela Schrute, my former accountant, 1393 00:58:23,044 --> 00:58:24,421 is now my wife. 1394 00:58:24,504 --> 00:58:25,922 My top salesman, Jim Halpert, 1395 00:58:26,006 --> 00:58:27,382 was best man at my wedding. 1396 00:58:27,465 --> 00:58:30,635 And office administrator Pamela Beesly Halpert 1397 00:58:30,760 --> 00:58:32,262 is my best friend. 1398 00:58:32,345 --> 00:58:33,513 So... 1399 00:58:33,596 --> 00:58:35,390 yes. 1400 00:58:35,473 --> 00:58:38,810 I'd say I have gotten along with my subordinates. 1401 00:58:38,893 --> 00:58:41,354 - You might feel sorry for me, 1402 00:58:41,438 --> 00:58:43,940 but I actually feel sorry for you, 1403 00:58:44,024 --> 00:58:46,067 because you're about to leave Cornell. 1404 00:58:46,151 --> 00:58:48,111 So say it with me. 1405 00:58:48,194 --> 00:58:51,489 all: Oh, I can so just sit here and cry. 1406 00:58:51,573 --> 00:58:52,449 [cheers and applause] 1407 00:58:52,574 --> 00:58:55,368 - Oh, yes! [applause] 1408 00:58:55,452 --> 00:58:57,620 - You did good. Real good. 1409 00:58:57,704 --> 00:59:00,123 - Thanks, Dad--Darryl. 1410 00:59:00,248 --> 00:59:03,293 I spent so much of my time here at Dunder Mifflin 1411 00:59:03,376 --> 00:59:05,378 thinking about my old pals, 1412 00:59:05,462 --> 00:59:07,756 my college a cappella group. 1413 00:59:07,839 --> 00:59:10,050 The weird thing is... 1414 00:59:10,091 --> 00:59:11,801 now I'm exactly where I wanna be. 1415 00:59:11,843 --> 00:59:15,472 I got my dream job at Cornell, 1416 00:59:15,597 --> 00:59:19,351 and I'm still just thinking about my old pals. 1417 00:59:19,434 --> 00:59:22,812 Only now they're the ones I made here. 1418 00:59:22,896 --> 00:59:26,566 I wish there was a way to know you're in the good old days 1419 00:59:26,691 --> 00:59:29,527 before you've actually left them. 1420 00:59:32,697 --> 00:59:35,992 Someone should write a song about that. 1421 00:59:36,034 --> 00:59:40,663 - You take something ordinary, like a piece of paper. 1422 00:59:40,705 --> 00:59:42,624 It's not much. 1423 00:59:42,707 --> 00:59:45,293 But if you see it 1424 00:59:45,377 --> 00:59:47,045 in the right way... 1425 00:59:49,130 --> 00:59:51,800 And that's what you did with this documentary. 1426 00:59:53,510 --> 00:59:55,345 But seriously, you made a nine-year documentary, 1427 00:59:55,470 --> 00:59:58,348 and you couldn't once show me doing my origami. 1428 00:59:58,431 --> 00:59:59,891 - Ten years ago, a doctor told me 1429 00:59:59,974 --> 01:00:01,685 the muscles in my cheeks had atrophied 1430 01:00:01,768 --> 01:00:03,103 from lack of smiling, 1431 01:00:03,186 --> 01:00:05,689 so I had exercises to do at bedtime. 1432 01:00:05,814 --> 01:00:07,857 It helped some, but now, 1433 01:00:07,982 --> 01:00:11,152 I'm smiling all the time, and I don't even notice. 1434 01:00:11,236 --> 01:00:13,196 So yeah, I think 1435 01:00:13,238 --> 01:00:15,949 I'm less of a total bitch now. 1436 01:00:16,032 --> 01:00:18,493 - I always knew looking back on the tears 1437 01:00:18,535 --> 01:00:19,994 would make me laugh, 1438 01:00:20,078 --> 01:00:22,080 but I never knew that looking back on the laughs 1439 01:00:22,163 --> 01:00:24,290 would make me cry. 1440 01:00:24,374 --> 01:00:26,543 Unknown. 1441 01:00:26,626 --> 01:00:28,628 It's my yearbook quote. 1442 01:00:28,670 --> 01:00:30,922 - Yeah, I mean, it's hard not to get emotional, 1443 01:00:30,964 --> 01:00:33,633 you know, when everybody around you is getting very emotional. 1444 01:00:33,758 --> 01:00:35,885 But somehow, I've managed to do it. 1445 01:00:35,969 --> 01:00:37,637 I feel great. 1446 01:00:37,721 --> 01:00:39,472 I ate a ton of meatballs at the warehouse party. 1447 01:00:39,597 --> 01:00:41,850 Just--just a lot-- lot of meatballs. 1448 01:00:43,018 --> 01:00:45,937 [laughter] 1449 01:00:48,523 --> 01:00:50,525 - Uh--ohh! 1450 01:00:57,824 --> 01:00:58,658 - Who's been here the longest? 1451 01:00:58,783 --> 01:00:59,951 - It was me. 1452 01:01:00,035 --> 01:01:01,202 - Oh, it's me now. 1453 01:01:01,286 --> 01:01:02,996 I started two days after Stanley. 1454 01:01:03,121 --> 01:01:05,206 - Why do I remember working here before Stanley? 1455 01:01:05,248 --> 01:01:07,250 - I'm pretty sure I was here before you, though. 1456 01:01:07,375 --> 01:01:09,169 - I'll tell you who's been here the longest. 1457 01:01:09,294 --> 01:01:10,962 That poor plant. 1458 01:01:11,087 --> 01:01:12,797 - Plantie. 1459 01:01:12,922 --> 01:01:15,008 - Wait, I don't remember that plant before. 1460 01:01:15,091 --> 01:01:17,802 - That plant is a survivor. 1461 01:01:17,844 --> 01:01:20,722 It's time for him to move on. 1462 01:01:20,805 --> 01:01:22,265 Let's set him free. 1463 01:01:22,349 --> 01:01:24,100 - Or her. - Oh, God. 1464 01:01:24,225 --> 01:01:25,435 [all groaning] - Oscar, come on. 1465 01:01:25,518 --> 01:01:26,936 - I'm just saying! - It's not all political. 1466 01:01:27,020 --> 01:01:29,189 - Let's get him some real sunlight 1467 01:01:29,314 --> 01:01:30,565 once and for all. - Yeah. 1468 01:01:30,648 --> 01:01:31,900 - Yes. - Somebody give me a hand. 1469 01:01:32,025 --> 01:01:33,693 - I'm on it. - Oh, my gosh. 1470 01:01:33,735 --> 01:01:35,362 We're really gonna do this. - Okay. 1471 01:01:35,445 --> 01:01:36,654 [laughter] - Hoist him out. 1472 01:01:36,738 --> 01:01:38,782 - Yeah! - Yes! 1473 01:01:38,823 --> 01:01:40,742 [indistinct chatter] 1474 01:01:40,784 --> 01:01:43,745 [cheering] 1475 01:01:45,789 --> 01:01:47,248 - Go ahead. - All right. 1476 01:01:52,796 --> 01:01:54,172 - Don't overpack the dirt. 1477 01:01:54,255 --> 01:01:55,965 [groans] Amateurs. 1478 01:01:56,007 --> 01:01:57,884 - Office plant. 1479 01:01:57,926 --> 01:02:01,221 all: Office plant, office plant! 1480 01:02:01,304 --> 01:02:04,015 Office plant, office plant! 1481 01:02:04,099 --> 01:02:05,684 - Yeah! 1482 01:02:05,725 --> 01:02:08,812 [cheers and applause] 1483 01:02:08,853 --> 01:02:11,815 [soft music playing] 1484 01:02:11,898 --> 01:02:18,530 ? ? 1485 01:02:18,655 --> 01:02:21,825 - ? I saw a friend today, it had been a while ? 1486 01:02:21,908 --> 01:02:23,868 ? ? 1487 01:02:23,952 --> 01:02:28,123 ? And we forgot each other's names ? 1488 01:02:28,164 --> 01:02:32,961 ? But it didn't matter 'cause deep inside ? 1489 01:02:33,003 --> 01:02:36,840 ? The feeling still remained the same ? 1490 01:02:36,881 --> 01:02:38,133 - Imagine going back 1491 01:02:38,258 --> 01:02:41,594 and watching a tape of your life. 1492 01:02:41,678 --> 01:02:43,972 You could see yourself... 1493 01:02:44,097 --> 01:02:48,351 change and make mistakes... 1494 01:02:48,393 --> 01:02:50,603 and grow up. 1495 01:02:50,729 --> 01:02:54,607 You could watch yourself fall in love, 1496 01:02:54,691 --> 01:02:57,736 watch yourself become a husband... 1497 01:02:57,819 --> 01:03:00,739 become a father. 1498 01:03:00,780 --> 01:03:04,451 You guys gave that to me. 1499 01:03:04,534 --> 01:03:09,039 And that's an amazing gift. 1500 01:03:09,205 --> 01:03:13,251 - Hey, Jim, remember Flonkerton when you did Office Olympics? 1501 01:03:13,418 --> 01:03:15,712 It was awesome. - Thanks, Phyl. 1502 01:03:15,795 --> 01:03:17,630 - I still have my medal from that. 1503 01:03:17,714 --> 01:03:19,132 - Do you even have a mattress? 1504 01:03:19,299 --> 01:03:21,051 - No, but I still have my medal from that. 1505 01:03:21,134 --> 01:03:26,681 ? ? 1506 01:03:26,723 --> 01:03:28,308 - Oscar. 1507 01:03:28,475 --> 01:03:31,102 Oscar. 1508 01:03:31,144 --> 01:03:34,856 [crying] I think I'm gay. 1509 01:03:34,939 --> 01:03:37,901 - Why do you say that? - [sniffles] 1510 01:03:38,026 --> 01:03:40,111 It's just that I'm so emotional. 1511 01:03:40,195 --> 01:03:42,238 - Yeah, but you're not gay. You're not gay. 1512 01:03:42,322 --> 01:03:45,992 - No, but maybe the reason-- - You're not gay. 1513 01:03:46,034 --> 01:03:50,705 - ? And all the faces that I know ? 1514 01:03:50,830 --> 01:03:55,293 ? Have that same familiar glow ? 1515 01:03:55,335 --> 01:03:59,255 ? I think I must have known them somewhere once before ? 1516 01:03:59,297 --> 01:04:00,840 - How did you do it? 1517 01:04:01,007 --> 01:04:03,426 How did you capture what it was really like? 1518 01:04:03,510 --> 01:04:06,304 How we felt and how we made each other laugh 1519 01:04:06,471 --> 01:04:08,515 and how we got through the day? 1520 01:04:08,640 --> 01:04:10,475 How did you do it? 1521 01:04:10,517 --> 01:04:12,727 Also, how do cameras work? 1522 01:04:12,811 --> 01:04:14,145 - Every day when I came into work, 1523 01:04:14,187 --> 01:04:16,314 all I wanted to do was leave. 1524 01:04:16,481 --> 01:04:18,191 So why in the world does it feel 1525 01:04:18,274 --> 01:04:20,568 so hard to leave right now? 1526 01:04:20,652 --> 01:04:23,029 - It all seems so very arbitrary. 1527 01:04:23,071 --> 01:04:25,990 I applied for a job at this company 1528 01:04:26,074 --> 01:04:27,742 because they were hiring. 1529 01:04:27,826 --> 01:04:29,661 I took a desk at the back 1530 01:04:29,703 --> 01:04:31,287 because it was empty. 1531 01:04:31,371 --> 01:04:33,873 But...[chuckles] 1532 01:04:33,998 --> 01:04:36,876 No matter how you get there or where you end up, 1533 01:04:37,043 --> 01:04:39,921 human beings have this miraculous gift 1534 01:04:40,046 --> 01:04:42,465 to make that place home. 1535 01:04:42,549 --> 01:04:49,514 ? ? 1536 01:04:51,016 --> 01:04:52,767 Let's do this. 1537 01:04:54,853 --> 01:04:56,813 - I just feel lucky that I got a chance 1538 01:04:56,896 --> 01:04:59,649 to share my crummy story with anyone out there 1539 01:04:59,733 --> 01:05:01,234 who thinks they're the only one 1540 01:05:01,317 --> 01:05:03,445 to take a dump in a paper shredder. 1541 01:05:03,528 --> 01:05:05,989 [clicks tongue] You're not alone, sister. 1542 01:05:06,156 --> 01:05:07,949 Let's get a beer sometime. 1543 01:05:08,033 --> 01:05:10,910 [indistinct chatter] 1544 01:05:13,496 --> 01:05:16,124 - I'm happy that this was all filmed, 1545 01:05:16,166 --> 01:05:18,793 so I can remember everyone and what we did. 1546 01:05:20,503 --> 01:05:22,422 I worked for a paper company all these years, 1547 01:05:22,464 --> 01:05:26,384 and I never wrote anything down. 1548 01:05:26,426 --> 01:05:28,178 - That was so much fun. 1549 01:05:28,219 --> 01:05:29,262 [indistinct chatter] 1550 01:05:29,346 --> 01:05:30,513 - Bye, Kev! 1551 01:05:30,638 --> 01:05:32,974 - I sold paper at this company for 12 years. 1552 01:05:33,016 --> 01:05:35,518 My job was to speak to clients on the phone 1553 01:05:35,602 --> 01:05:38,772 about quantities and types of copier paper. 1554 01:05:38,855 --> 01:05:42,734 Even if I didn't love every minute of it, 1555 01:05:42,859 --> 01:05:48,406 everything I have, I owe to this job. 1556 01:05:48,490 --> 01:05:50,700 This stupid... 1557 01:05:50,742 --> 01:05:53,203 wonderful... 1558 01:05:53,286 --> 01:05:55,330 boring... 1559 01:05:55,413 --> 01:05:58,333 amazing job. 1560 01:05:58,416 --> 01:06:01,920 - I thought it was weird when you picked us 1561 01:06:01,961 --> 01:06:04,172 to make a documentary. 1562 01:06:04,339 --> 01:06:07,258 But all in all... 1563 01:06:07,342 --> 01:06:10,512 I think an ordinary paper company like Dunder Mifflin 1564 01:06:10,553 --> 01:06:14,683 was a great subject for a documentary. 1565 01:06:14,724 --> 01:06:18,436 There's a lot of beauty in ordinary things. 1566 01:06:18,520 --> 01:06:21,398 Isn't that kind of the point? 1567 01:06:21,481 --> 01:06:26,861 ? ? 1568 01:06:32,701 --> 01:06:35,578 [cheerful music] 1569 01:06:35,704 --> 01:06:42,669 ? ? 1570 01:06:42,719 --> 01:06:47,269 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0